I'm just your normal social outcast
by Ausllyforeverxx
Summary: I'm sick of it, I'm sick of life and i'm sick of HIM! Why does he hate me so much? My dad's getting worse and him and his childish attitude isn't helping! I'm just sick of it all.
1. This isn't going to be pretty

**Yeah, yeah, it's been done before I know, but I hope this story has a little individuality in it. I'm not sure about the plot line so please tell me what you think.**

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Ally's p.o.v:

I walked slowly down the corridors of my school. My eyesight not lifting from my old, tattered converse. It was quite early, so luckily I could mind my own business without getting crap from the people who are known as 'the populars' actually scrap that, getting crap from every single person in the whole entire school! But people usually they all wait until Austin moon and his…henchmen to arrive before they say anything to me, just so Austin can acknowledge their assistance.

_Austin moon_, even his stupid name tastes like poison in my mouth. Behind the bright blonde hair, sparkly eyes and perfect skin he was, excuse my language, an asshole. He was your usual king of high school, the one like in the movies. He'd have every girl eating out of the palm of his hand, he's 'hot' and he has his little queen to follow him around like a lost puppy. That was the reason why I hated him. Despite the fact the fact he makes my life a living hell, he's also goddamn perfect! Seriously, he's got the looks, he's popular and he has the time to actually get good grades, I wouldn't be surprised if he could fly! He really roasts my nuts.

"Ally Dawson, can you hear me?" a voice screamed into my ear. I broke from my daydream and turned around to see my best friend; Trish. Trish wasn't like me, she can't keep her emotions inside of her, she has to show them. She's not the person to mess with, there were even rumours going around that she killed someone after they called her a bad name. Of course they weren't true though, I think.

Me and Trish made an agreement 3 years ago, we could hang out before school, after school and weekends. Basically when no one could see her with me. She's tried to change my mind about it a billion times but I don't want her getting the crap I do.

I smiled at her. "Hey Trish, how was your weekend?" I asked, putting my books into my locker, taking out my black song book. She shrugged at me.

"Same old, same old, how's your dad?" she asked giving me a sympathetic smile. I smiled back and closed my locker.

"He's you know, still refusing treatment" I replied my voice cracking in places.

My dad has leukaemia and refused to accept treatment 2 months ago, because apparently it's 'his time to go'. My fathers not a quitter, he's just sick of feeling so ill all the time. He can barely move, he just lays all day in bed. I take care of him when I'm not in school. The doctors are trying to get legal rights to give him the treatment with his permission but they told me not to get my hopes too high. The only people who knows about are Trish and my teacher; miss swallow, she's the only teacher in the school I can trust. She caught me crying in the janitors closet a month ago, so I told her the whole story about my dad. She told me to keep my head held high and to keep praying. Ever since that she's kept an eye on me.

She groaned at me "Ally, you're 16, you can't spend your teen years looking after your dad" she whined. I rolled my eyes and leaned against the lockers.

"What else am i supposed to do? He's my dad and he's...dying, i can't just sit there and watch" i replied, turning my head to the floor.

Trish pulled me into a short, friendly hug. I hugged back and we both pulled away. "You better go, pretty boys gonna' be here any minute" I said with a small smile.

'Pretty boy' is mine and Trish's nickname for Austin. I genially pushed her the opposite way to where I was heading.

"Ally, when are you going to let me give him what's coming to him?" she whined. I laughed and rolled my eyes at her.

"On the 31st of February" I replied, while walking to my homeroom.

She shut her locker, counting on her fingers. "Hey, there is no 31st of February" she yelled at me. I turned around and gave her a thumbs up.

"Exactly" I yelled back.

* * *

"Come on Ally, think!" I whispered/yelled to myself. I tapped my pen impatiently on my book. I guess my inspiration today was late. I couldn't think of one single verse.

I put my pen to the paper and began to write.

_Dear diary, _

_What the fish sticks is wrong with me today?! I can't write one single verse. I think I'm a little distracted today, maybe I got too much sun over the weekend, wait, I didn't even go out over the weekend! Maybe it's because Austin moon hasn't said anything to me today? That' s it! Nothing at all. He just walked straight past me with a stupid smirk on his stupid face. I'm terrified for what he' s got in plan for me. Whenever he never says anything to me it normally end up being bad, horrible. Last time he locked me out of school when it was pouring it down, I ended up getting soaked and I got a detention for being late to class. Why does he hate me so much?! I swear I've done __nothing__ to him. _

_Lots of love, Ally x_

The bell rang minutes later, I sighed and packed my things away. My plan was to get into the cafeteria without pretty boy seeing me. That plan didn't go very well when I bumped right into him, causing us both to fall. Oh no this isn't going to be pretty.


	2. pizza stained shirts

**I'm sooo happy with the positive feedback, so i decided to write another chapter:D**

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_~chapter two: pizza stained shirts~_

I hid my embarrassed red face and pulled myself off the floor. Pretty boy stood up, brushed himself off and turn to face me. He looked pissed. "Next time watch where you're going, nut job!" he snapped. I bit my tongue, stopping myself from yelling back, nodding in its replace.

He gave me a disgusted look and took his girlfriend's hand. "What a freak" he mumbled as they walked away. I clenched my fists and flung my bag over my shoulder. I made my way slowly to the cafeteria, people laughing and whispering as I passed them. _Just keep walking. You're the bigger person. _

I blocked out the sound around me. I heard the occasional "freak" and "nut job". I'll personally thank pretty boy for those. He's the one who first called me freak, why? Because I'm different of course.

I reached the cafeteria and sat in my usual place. I took out my lunch and began chewing on my tuna sandwich. The same routine, every day. I felt a small vibrating coming from my pocket. I took out my phone and saw a text from Trish.

'_I saw you talking to pretty boy. What happened? What did you do this time? Did he say anything to you? OMG he threatened you didn't he! That little bastard! by the way belle says hi! X' _

I smiled at the text. Trust Trish to ask 20 questions. She really worries too much about unimportant things. I wrapped my hands around my phone and quickly replied. Oh, belle is Trish's friend who she met last years, she's really sweet.

'_Stop worrying Trish. I bumped into him and accidentally knocked us both to the floor. No, he didn't threaten me and Trish, you know how I feel about swearing! Hey belle:) X' _

I sighed and looked around the cafeteria. This high school was way too superficial. Everyone had their own tables. There was the drama kids; Ricky Williams and the others, the idiotic jocks; Tom rodes and the other stupid idiots, the emos; scarlet Walters and her…kind of people, and then on the biggest table were the populars; Austin moon and his followers.

That table consists of Austin, of course, His girlfriend Cassidy the slut of the school she's literally done almost every guy in the school, Austin's best friend Dez I've never really talked to him but he's anything like Austin im glad I haven't, there was also Sophia, Cassidy's best friend, Jay, and holly.

I felt my phone vibrate In my hand. I looked down at it, reading the text.

'_You're my best friend ally how can I not worry? He treats you like crap and it's not right. Yeah, I know about your little saying. Swearing leads to tattoos, pricings and teenage pregnancy… Any way see you after school! X'_

I stood up and collected my things. As I began to walk out of the cafeteria I felt a small poke on the back of my shoulder. I stopped and turned around, my heart stopping when I came face-to-face with pretty boy. "What do you want?" I mumbled, looking down at my book. He followed my gaze and stared at my book for a while, then turned his attention back to me.

"Hey freak, I have something for you" he replied, a small grin forming on his face, he flipped his blonde hair away from his eyes. That's when I noticed his left arm was hidden suspiciously behind his back. I narrowed my eyes ever so slightly and took a few steps away from him.

"Really? what would that be?" I asked sounding confident. Deep down I was terrified because I knew this wasn't going to be something I should look forward to. He took a step closer to me and before I could say _'get away from me you hair flipping pretty boy'_ he dumped a large pizza onto my shirt, it slid down slowly. I had yet to notice the whole school was watching this little scene. The quite room was now filled with roars of laughter. I looked down at my now stained shirt. I felt paralyzed, I couldn't move from that single spot.

"You have some pizza on your shirt" he mocked while wiping his finger down the middle of my shirt and licking it after. I felt my eyes burn. They threatened to spill out with the tears they were collecting fast. I ignored the laughter and pointing at me. The bell rang loudly. I stood up tall, walking past Austin our shoulders colliding hard as I did. I was trying to look unharmed by his immature prank, I didn't work. I quickly walked to the girls bathroom. I rested my hands on the side of the sink and let out all of my emotions right there. My cheeks suddenly became soaked with tears. I had never cried in school before. Ever. But I couldn't take it anymore. The whole school was laughing at me and no one even cared that I was almost crying. I hate them all they're a bunch of selfish, arrogant dicks! **Mental note: tell Trish to yell at me for swearing mentally. **

I wiped my tear-stained cheeks and tried to get off as much pizza as possible. In the end my shirt was still covered in pizza but looked a lot better. It's a good job I have a gym shirt in my locker.

I pushed past the crowd of people. It was a nightmare trying to get anywhere in this school. I reached my locker and took out the plain white gym shirt and closed the locker behind me. The hallway was now empty. I ran back to the girls bathroom and changed my shirt. I placed the pizza covered one into my bag and jogged my way to class.

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"Ah, miss Dawson, care to explain why you are late to my class?" an angry, mr fisher asked me, tapping his foot. I shot him an apologetic, sweet smile.

"Mr Fisher, sir, I um, I had to…Talk to another member of staff, an emergency." I stammered. His stare deepened at me and his foot stopped tapping. He sighed.

"well, miss Dawson, since this is your first ever time being late to my lesson, I'll let you off. Now take a seat and try to catch up" he replied turning his attention to the board again.

I turned around and looked around the full up classroom. My seat at the front had been taken by Judie jacks, a small redhead who never talks to anyone. I mumbled to myself and looked around. "hurry up! look, there is a seat at the back there" mr fisher yelled making me jump.

Now this caught my attention. There was a seat at the back. But sitting there would be like signing a death contract. The seat was next to the one and only Austin moon. He was sat there patting the seat with a smug grin. "Um I'd rather sit somewhere else, sir" I replied nervously.

Mr fisher's cheeks turned red, almost like a cartoon, his short stubby nose flared quickly. "it's either that seat, or you can spend the rest of your school days in detention" he snapped. I turned back to Austin, who's grin had widened.

"I choose detention" I said with a nervous smile. He narrowed his eyes and pointed to the seat.

"Sit...Now!" he screamed. I huffed and dragged my feet to my early grave.


	3. Working two jobs

**Thank you to all the amazing reviewers, you guys rock! Here's an extra long chapter! :D**

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_~chapter 3: working two jobs~_

I took a deep breath and sat on the seat. "Hey freak" Austin whispered while poking my arm with a pen. I rolled my eyes and ignored him. His pen kept stabbing my arm, every poke getting harder.

I spun my head to face him. "Look you ass wipe," I snapped "this is just one hour, why can't you just stop torturing me for one freakin' second?!" his smug smirk disappeared and he blinked at me. He seemed shocked and embarrassed, but seconds later his stupid smirk appeared again.

"Wow, freak. I never knew you could yell like that" he said as he began poking me again. This is going to be a long hour.

I smiled and waved to Trish and Belle as I walked over to them. "hey guys" I greeted them. They both smiled and waved at me.

"Hey ally, you okay? You seem pretty out of it?" Belle asked me. I nodded a little.

"yeah, I'm fine. Just a little tired" I replied, tucking some of my bushy hair behind my ear lazily. We all started to walk out of the school.

"You guys going to the party on Saturday?" Trish asked us. I shook my head and continued walking. Trish scoffed at my answer.

"ally, you need a social life, why aren't you going?" she whined, while belle agreed by nodding her head at a few words.

I shrugged "I don't know Trish, why don't I go to a party that I haven't been invited to, where the host hates me and has made my life a nightmare for 4 years straight, where I probably will end up alone on the corner of a full room where everyone else is drinking and having fun. Please tell why I've never been to one of Austin moon's parties before, enlighten me!" I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down I looked towards Trish "sorry, I'm just stressed and all" I said softly. She nodded and smiled at me.

"it's fine, I should have thought about what could happen, you don't have to go ally. But you do belle" she pointed to belle next to her. I giggled a little, then I turned around as I heard a loud beeping coming from behind us.

I knew that car. I knew it like the back of my hand, and it was slowing down, and the windows were rolling down.

"belle you always say that-" Trish started to say before I could her off.

"Duck!" I screamed as the car was now next to us, a cup handing out of it. We all ducked as the cup flew passed us.

I stood up right and glared at the couple in the car. "Aw, you're no fun" Cassidy said with her 'cute' signature pout she did when things didn't go her way.

I smiled sarcastically at her "nice to see you to" I murmured just loud enough for Trish and belle to hear me and snigger at my remark. She narrowed her eyes at me and turned to face her Romeo…well pretty boy, she kissed his cheek and turned back to us.

"I didn't know you were all friends" she said, pointing to Trisha and belle. She placed her hand on her heart "Aww so cute, the three losers" my heart sank.

"um, were not friends, they were just telling me what a, fre-freak I was" I replied, looking down. She raised a brow at me.

She looked at Trish and belle "whatever, I knew a freak like you wouldn't have friends anyway, come on baby let's go" she glared at me for the last time before they sped off in pretty boys expensive car.

"let's go baby, I'm going to act like a little princess, but then I'm going to shag all of your friends behind your back" Trish said as she flipped her hair like a Barbie doll.

I laughed "well he deserves it, I bet he's cheated on her loads of times, he's a player" I said shrugging. Trish rolled her eyes at me.

"We know, we know. You always say how 'boys like him only break girls' hearts and blah, blah, blah" she said trying to impersonate me. I scoffed.

"first; I don't talk like that and secondly; it's true he's just gonna' break her heart, I'll see you later guys" I said with a wave as I walked up to my front door. They waved back at me. I unlock and opened the door slowly and slowly walked in, closing the door carefully behind me. I looked around the messy house and made my way upstairs to my father's room. I knocked lightly on the door before entering.

"Hey, how was school?" he asked me in a weak voice, that always made my heart-break just a little more. I smiled and sat on the end of the bed.

"It was great, everyone loved my new song" I replied, putting on a fake smile.

Okay, okay. So I lied to my dad. He thinks I'm the most popular girl in school, he doesn't know about Austin, or Cassidy or the constant name calling and pranks etc. I don't want him worrying about me when he…goes. I don't plan on ever telling him.

He smiled "That's great honey. Maybe you can perform it for them soon" he said with a smile full of hope. I laughed.

"Dad, you know about my stage fright, maybe one day I'll over come it, for you" I kissed his forehead genially "How have you been feeling?" I asked.

He put two shaky thumbs up. "A lot better" he replied them let out a deep, chesty cough. He sighed "Maybe a little worse, I just need to sleep, do you think you can play the piano again for me?" he asked and pulled the covers over his unbelievable skinny body.

I nodded and walked over to the grand piano in the corner and sat down at the stool. I let my finger trace over the white keys before placing them onto the correct place and beginning the song I wrote for him. (1)

I played the song and stop, hearing snoring coming from behind me. I giggled to myself and stood up and made my way out of the room, I turned around before leaving completely "love you, dad" I whispered and shut the door behind me.

I sighed and walked back down the stairs. I walked into the kitchen and looked around. I huffed to myself and walked over to the counter. I picked up some of the packets and threw them into the trashcan, I did the same until it was a little more clearer. With school, looking after my dad and working 2 jobs, I just didn't have the time to clean. Trish always tells me to quit my second job, because I can't quit working at my dad's store 'sonic boom' which I work on Mondays, Wednesdays and Saturdays. My second job is working at a pet adoption centre just around the corner it was called 'make a home'. I've worked there for 2 years now, simply because we needed the money, desperately. I work there Tuesday's, Thursdays and Fridays. Sundays my day off, or sometimes if we need some extra money, I'll work at sonic boom for the day. Today; is Friday.

I looked in the mirror at my blank, pale face. I didn't see the point of wearing a lot of make up like most girls who cap their faces in it. I ran my finger through my hair and let it fall over my shoulder. I sighed to myself and dragged my feet back up the stairs to my room. I took out my work shirt which had a picture of a cartoon dog and cat on it, I took off my white gym shirt and changed quickly, I decided to keep my floral skirt on. I placed my name tag on and quickly ran down the stairs. I picked up my bag and headed out of the door, locking it behind me and throwing my bag over my shoulder.

"sorry I'm late jenny!" I said in an out of breath voice. Jenny, my boss, smiled warmly at me. I put my bag in my locker and walked up to the counter next to her.

"Ally, are you sure you're fit enough to work today? you look exhausted" she asked looking worried. I Shrugged and smiled.

"I feel fine, now what do I have to do today?" I asked, rubbing my hands together enthusiastically. She rolled her eyes at me.

"Well, you can go feed them first, I know how much you love to feed Trevor" she gave me a wink. I fist-pumped the air.

"yes!" I yelled and walked to the back of the building. The make a home building wasn't actually that big, it had the reception where people came to ask to adopt, the kennels where we keep everyone, storage and jenny's office. I spent most of my day in the kennels and the reception. Here, we kept dogs, cats and fish. It wasn't a huge store but it was very popular in the neighbourhood. I filled up all thee bowls and slid them into the cages of each animal, until I reached my favourite, Trevor. Trevor has been here the longest than all. He was a large golden retriever, but even with his old age he still acted like a puppy. I just found him so cute. I let him out of his cage and sat down on the floor with him, he licked every inch of my face then sat down and looked at me. What I loved most about him was that he knew I needed someone to talk to, someone who wont judge me, or ask questions, I needed Trevor.

"Hey boy" I greeted him while petting his ear softly. His tale wagged at my voice. "I missed you, who wants a treat" I brought a treat out of my pocket and held it in front of him, he quickly raced towards it but I covered my hand. "no, what do you do?" I asked, he sat down again then stood up on his back legs and barked at me. I giggled and gave him the treat "good boy" he came and laid down on my lap, while I petted his back.

"I wish I could take you home" I whispered. He licked my hand a little, like he could almost understand me. "we'd have so much fun together, and you'd show Austin, right? I'd love to see that" I sighed deeply. "I wonder sometimes, what's going to happen to me, when my dad, passes. Will I get pushed into some care home somewhere? Or will they let me stay by myself…or course they wouldn't I'm a minor. I just wish things were easier. I wish I could have a life like Austin, he seems so happy all the time, he has money, looks, loads of friends and let he still thinks it's okay to make me feel worthless. If only he knew about every bit of crap I have to go through, I bet he'd still treat me like it, because that's who he is, he'll never change." I kissed the top of Trevor's head.

"So who's this Austin?" a voice said behind me making me scream from shock. I turned around to see jenny standing there. I smiled up at her.

"Just a guy from school, he torments me everyday and doesn't even care, he despises me" I stood up and put Trevor back into his cage.

She raised a brow at me. "Really? Have you told anyone?" she asked me, crossing her arms tightly. I shook my head sheepishly. "Ally! You need to tell someone, no matter what bullying isn't right and it needs to be stopped" she stressed.

I rolled my eyes and scoffed "it's not bullying, he's just a childish jerk who likes attention, nothing more besides it's only because I'm only like the other girls at school, I don't stand out to him and I never will I'm just old, ugly Ally. Um, My shifts over, I spent way too long talking to Trevor." I mumbled, surprisingly she pulled me into a tight hug.

"oh ally if only you saw the potential I see in you" she whispered into my hair. "and, it was past your shift an hour ago, it's 9:55" she said looking at her watch. My eyes widened and I looked at the clock that hung on the wall.

"oh no, I have homework to do and everything, I'll see you on Tuesday, jenny, bye Trev." I yelled into the kennel while grabbing my bag and running out of the door before jenny could stop me again. I ran all the way home, which wasn't far, but heck it was tiring. I opened the door and put down my bag, getting my school bag and taking out my books. "must stay awake, must do homework, stay awake ally!" I mumbled to myself while I wrote down the answer to the first question. I answered every question with ease.

"so tired" I said with a yawn. I picked up my phone and looked at the time, my whole face screwing up in anger…time to get ready for work.

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**(1) Lets say she played 'A river flows in you - yiruma'**

**Thanks for reading!**


	4. Helping Trish and Belle get ready

**There are no words to describe how amazing you guys are :') if I could I'd give yall a bear hug, but i can't, so we'll have to settle with a virtual one instead**_._

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_~chapter 4: Helping Trish and Belle get ready~_

"Welcome to sonic boom how may I Hel…Hey guys" I greeted Trish and Belle. They smiled and rested their elbows on the desk in front of me.

"Hey Ally, me and Belle were shopping for dresses for tonight and thought we'd visit you" Trish said as she held up 4 bags in her hands.

"Oh right. The party. Great" I gave her a sarcastic thumbs up and plastered a large cheesy smile on my face. Trish rolled her eyes at me.

"You're such a buzz kill, even if you're not going can't you be happy that me and Belle actually got invited this time? We got invited to Austin moon's party!" she yelled as she threw both her arms up into the air.

I huffed and slammed my leather book shut. "I gave you thumbs up, what more do you want? Besides it's only a party and you don't need an invite anyway" I replied taking out folder full of messed up paper. Belle picked up some of the mess and began to help me sort it out.

"So what time is this 'awesome' party?" I asked doing hand gestures. Belle took out her phone and checked the time.

"Well its 3pm now, so 4 hours" she replied.

I shook my head in disbelief "wow, a 7pm party, wild!" I said sarcastically. Belle grinned at me and put the paper she sorted into the folder.

"Hey Ally, think you can come round to mine at 5:30 to help us get ready, you know you do the best hairstyles and make up ever" she pleaded. I smiled and nodded.

"Sure, see you then" I said with a yawn. Trish jumped up and now with excitement.

"Awesome! See you later Ally, we've got shopping to do!" she sang while dragging belle out by her arm.

I giggled to myself and walked over to the door, I turned to sign from 'open' to 'closed' and made my way to my practise room. I sighed happily and sat at the piano stool. I opened my book and got out my pen. I felt creative today. I tapped my pen on the side of the piano. I thought about how I felt at this moment in time. I thought about how I can't hang out with my own friends, how lonely I actually felt everyday, about how stupid pretty boy had almost ruined my life for no reason at all and how I felt this way for years. I was 13 when my dad started to get ill that's when things got worse. I put my pen to the paper and began to write, pouring my heart and soul in every word.

_**Conversations with my 13-year-old self**_

_**Conversations with my 13-year-old self**_

_**you're angry**_

_**I know this**_

_**The world couldn't care less**_

_**You're lonely**_

_**I feel this**_

_**And you wish you were the best**_

_**No teachers**_

_**Or guidance**_

_**And you always walk alone**_

_**You're crying At night when**_

_**Nobody else is home **_

_**Come over here and let me hold your hand and hug you darling**_

_**I promise you that it won't always feel this bad**_

_**There are so many things I want to say to you**_

_**You're the girl I used to be**_

_**You little heartbroken thirteen year old me (1)**_

I felt warm tears falling down my cheeks as I sung out every word with feeling, almost like I was singing it to myself. I stopped playing and finally broke down; I rested my head into the keys of the piano, making a horrible noise as I did so. I cried into my arms until I couldn't cry and longer.

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I lifted my head and wiped my red, tear-stained cheeks. I took a deep breath and packed away all my stuff. I knew I spent hours writing, and crying. At least 2 and a half. I ran my fingers through my hair and picked up my things. I locked up my practise room and headed down the stairs. I walked out of the front door and locked it behind me. I walked my way back home and found my dad struggling to climb down the stairs. "Dad! What are you doing?" I yelled while I threw my bag onto the floor and rushed to his side. I pulled him up by his arms and helped him up the stairs onto his bed.

"Thank you honey, I guess I'm not as strong as I used to be" he exclaimed. I frowned at him and shot him a glare.

"Dad, why were you out of bed, the doctor said you could really hurt yourself with any kind of movements, you bruise really easily" I placed my hands on my hips and he smiled.

"You remind me so much of your mother. I needed a glass of water, besides I'm fit and healthy" he replied, I scoffed at this sentence. I walked to the bathroom and poured him a glass of water, then took it back to him.

"Thanks honey, you better get going, Trish kept calling me asking if you were home yet" he said as he sipped the glass of water.

"oh yeah, she wanted me to do her hair and make up for a party, if you need anything just call me and I'll be over straight away, later dad" I kissed his cheek and made my way out and headed to Trish's house.

I might be 16, but I don't have a license yet, I can't even afford a car! How amazing would it be if I could drive?! Just to be able to escape when I wanted to.

I arrived at Trish's house and knocked on the door, belle answered looking stressed out. "Hey Ally, come in" she said in an out of breath voice. I did as she said and walked in. we walked into Trish's bedroom and my mouth hung open, it was covered in outfits, make up, hair accessories and other stuff. I turned to face Trish.

"Ally! Thank god you're here, please can you zip me up? Belle's stressing over her dress" she asked me, I nodded and zipped up her neon short, pink dress. She spun around to face me. "Awesome, now make up and hair" she said while gripping my wrist and dragging me to the corner of her room.

After an hour I had done both Trish's and belle's make up and hair. I hung Trish's black tight curls in a loose bun at the top of her head, some strand's hanging out. For her make up I put a light pink eye shadow on, some blush, deep red lipstick and natural mascara.

For Belle, her hair was bleached bright blonde and was naturally straight. I pulled the top layer of her hair and clipped it to the back of her hair while letting her bangs hand over her eyes, I straightened the rest. Belle's dress was a black knee-length party dress, so I used a black, smokey eye shadow along with a thick line of black eyeliner, flirty fake lasses and some Barbie pink lip-gloss. Belle was more of a 'dress to impress' kind of person basically she loved to dress up.

"wow, thank you Ally, I feel so sexy" Belle said as she put on her 7 inch black heels. I rolled my eyes at her killer shoes and smiled sweetly at her. Trish pulled on her, not-so-feet-murdering, 4 inch pink heels. I took Trish's phone and took a picture of them both posing while blowing a kiss to the phone. I laughed and placed Trish's phone into my pocket.

"Yeah you rock Ally, I'll call you tomorrow" they both hugged me goodbye and left in Belle's car. Like me, Trish doesn't have a licence. I started to make my way home until I realized I still had Trish's phone. I took the phone out and called belle…no answer. Great.

"Well Ally girl, looks like you're finally going to see one of Austin moon's parties" I mumbled while storming off towards Austin's house.

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**(1) Song: p!nk - conversations with my 13-year-old self. **

**The next chapter will be longer and, wait for it, will contain some auslly moments…kinda. **


	5. Getting along with pretty boy!

**There is a small amount of 'auslly' in this chapter. Remember a ****small**** amount, so don't suspect anything dramatic.**

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_~chapter 5: Getting along with pretty boy?!~_

I stood outside Austin's house, amazed at how big it was, and how many people were outside sucking each others faces off. I grimaced at the moaning and slurping as the couples made out. I dodged the couples and walked through the front door. As soon as I entered I felt out-of-place. I didn't know where to stand, how to look, how to talk to people, I stuck out like a sore thumb with a huge purple pimple on top. I shifted my weight from one foot to another, not sure on what to do next. I felt a strong pull on my arm and before I knew it I was dragged into the middle of the room, with a random guy who I'd never seen before grinding up against me. I blushed a deep red and stepped away from him. He quickly pulled me back and began running his hands up and down my back. I shivered from his touch and turned around. He was obviously drunk as he winked seductively at me. I rolled my eyes and took a girl's hand and placed it into his "Enjoy" I shouted over the music and with that I walked away from them as they started to dance together. When you're the schools 'nobody' you don't expect about 20 guys to try to hit on you in one whole hour. They were all drunk, but still…

After an hour and a half I figured that I'd never find Trish in this house. I walked to the front door but sighed as a huge conga line blocked my way towards it. I spun around and made my way out of the back door instead. I walked into the dark garden and wrapped my arms tightly around myself, to keep myself warm. My breath made an icy cloud in front of me as I began to walk. I froze as I saw 2 dark figures standing in the middle of the garden, inches away from each other, yelling. I walked my way around them without being seen. I stopped again in the shadows and watched cautiously.

"You're not listening to me" the smaller figure yelled while stepping closer to the other person. The taller figure backed away from them, leading them both into the light. Pretty boy and his queen. Why the heck were they arguing? I laughed to myself and watched in amusement.

"Cassidy, just shut up for one second! It's not always about you, I just need to think" he yelled back, taking her by surprise.

She let a single tear slip down her perfect clear cheek. "Baby, I never meant for things to get so bad, I wanted to tell you, I didn't want to hurt you" she cried desperately. He scoffed.

"5 fucking months! 5 months you were sleeping with him and you thought I'd never find out?! What, am I not good enough for you Cas, is he hotter than me? His he richer than me?" she shook her head at all the answers. "What's the problem then for fuck sake! We've been together for 2 years and you were going to throw away everything we had for a nobody? Something must be wrong with me, I'm just not good enough for you, right?!" his voice was getting louder with every word. I was surprised no one had come out to see what all the noise was.

Cassidy wiped her cheeks and sobbed quietly to herself. "You always wanted everything to go your way, and if someone didn't do what you wanted, they'd end up like that freak, Ally Dawson, an outcast who everybody laughs at. I love you Austy, but you're so controlling and I couldn't handle it. Please forgive me babe!" she flung herself Austin and tried to kiss him. He turned his head to the side so her lips landed on his cheek instead.

"Just go home Cassidy, I'll call you tomorrow when were both sober and we'll talk it through" he mumbled through gritted teeth. She nodded with a hurt look and walked off into the street. Austin walked over to a bench and placed himself onto it. He ran his hands through his hair and let out a loud, annoyed groan. He rested his face In his hands.

I couldn't help it. I'm Ally Dawson. When someone's upset, even if it is pretty boy, I have to comfort them. That's why I'm almost at bench he's sat on, about to ask him if he's okay.

I reached the bench and cleared my throat. He looked up at me, his eyes widened as they met mine. I smiled nervously. "um, I, umm I saw you arguing, I was just wondering if you're, um, okay" I stuttered out. He rolled his eyes and me.

"Get lost freak" he said with hate in his voice. I shook my head in anger and flew my hands up into the cold air.

"Even when I try to help you, you treat me like crap. I don't know what Cassidy did. But it looks like she really hurt you. I don't know if you deserved it or not. But right now, I'm thinking you did" I spat, before I began to storm off in a rage.

"Please, stay" I heard him called after me. I stopped and turned around, he looked directly at me, pleading me with his eyes. I sighed and walked over to him, sitting down next to him making sure I didn't sit too close. "She was cheating on me, for 5 months, with some exchange student" he whispered to me. I raised both my eye brows. Everybody knows Cassidy is a slut, even pretty boy knows it, but 5 months is low even for her.

"I'm sorry, you really don't deserve it, I don't know why I said that" I replied, feeling foolish and a little ashamed. He laughed a little and shrugged.

"I do, I really do. Like you said, even when you try to help me I treat you like crap. I knew she'd normally go sleep with a random guys sometimes, but I never knew she'd carry something on for this long. It shouldn't bother me, but it does" he rested his head back into his hands and sighed into them.

I was really stuck for words. It wasn't everyday when 'the' Austin moon, the most popular guy in school, the guy who's made your life feel like rubbish for years, pours his heart out to you about how his perfect girlfriend has cheated on him. I was just plain Ally Dawson, I never talk to popular kids, I never give them advice or a shoulder to cry on. So why was I now?

"D-do you really think you're not good enough for her?" I asked with disbelief. He lifted his head and faced me.

"I don't know. I feel like I need to live up to all her expectations, take her out when she wants, buy her gifts all the time, tell her how beautiful she is" he replied.

I smiled secretly to myself. I never knew he could be so…human. How could someone of his standards feel not worthy enough for a slut?

"I know it's not really my place to say anything. But it kind of sounds like… like she's taking advantaged of you, you shouldn't need to buy her all the gifts, take her out, tell her she's beautiful, your trying to be perfect for nothing in return" I said with a small smile.

He straightened up, which for pretty boy, wasn't a good sign. When he straightens up it means he's either annoyed, tired, getting ready to leave or all of the above. Okay, so i know him well, don't judge me.

"You're right, it's not your place to say anything. So keep your nose out, nut job, me and Cassidy don't need freak's like you telling us what to think " he said with a death glare. I glared back, my blood boiling under my skin.

"Okay, listen hear mr. popular. I didn't have to stay out here in the freezing cold with you, I did that because you asked. I didn't have to give you my advice or just my ear so you had someone to talk to, I did it because you needed it. So don't even tell me that I was telling you what to think. Because deep down, I was only saying what we both thought." I yelled. We were both standing now, too annoyed to even realize that there were huge crowds leaving the party, drunk out of their minds.

"You think you know everything don't you?! God, no I wasn't thinking that. I love Cassidy and she is not in any way taking advantage of me, she never would. That's why I said you were telling me what to think, because you think just because you might be smart you know every little fucking thing to know. Well you don't. You don't know me and you don't know Cassidy. This is just a little bump in the road for us. It's not going to change anything. Just because nobody would ever love a fat, ugly freak like you doesn't mean you can come and try to mess up me and Cassidy" he screamed at me. I stood there completely froze with anger and, well hurt. What was I supposed to do now? I felt like crying. I felt like running home to my dad. I felt like bleeding until I die. I felt so disappointed.

"For one moment. I actually thought that it was possible that you had a heart. I guess people shouldn't get their hopes up." I mumbled. I turned around and walked miserably home.

I didn't take my eye sight from the path. It felt like someone had just told me that my dad only had a day to live. Like they'd just ran over my puppy. How did someone I hate so much have this effect on me?! I shouldn't care what he says about me, I shouldn't be hurt buy the fact he called me fat and ugly, and I don't. I don't give a damn what he says.

I opened the door to my house and walked upstairs, building on a fake smile. "Hey dad" I greeted as I opened his bedroom door. He sat up and smiled at me.

"Hey baby girl, what took you so long?" he asked with a croaky voice. I smiled and shrugged lazily.

"Trish dragged me to the party. I had an awesome time. I danced with everybody and Trish told me that she loved her hair and make up, it was so much fun!" I lied with fake enthusiasm.

He smiled and dug himself under the covers. "That's my girl, you're so adorable, and one day your going to be the best song writer ever known" my smile diapered and I felt a large lump form in my throat.

"th-thanks dad, you need to rest, night" I replied, closing the door behind me. I took a deep breath and walked over to my own room, sitting down on my windowsill. I opened the leather book sat next to me and read what I already wrote. I took the pen in my hand and wrote some more while humming the tune for it.

_**You're laughing**_

_**But you're hiding**_

_**God I know that trick too well**_

_**You forget **_

_**That I've been you**_

_**And now I'm just the shell**_

_**I promise**_

_**I love you **** andEverything will work out fine**_

_**Don't try to**_

_**Grow up yet**_

_**Oh just give it some time**_

_**The pain you feel is real you're not asleep but it's a nightmare**_

_**But you can wake up anytime**_

_**Oh don't lose your passion or the fighter that's inside of you**_

_**You're the girl I used to be**_

_**The pissed off complicated thirteen year old me**_

I shut my book and climbed into my bed.

* * *

"He said what to you?! I'll kill him, I swear to god I'll rip his blonde shiny hair from his hot little head!" Trish screamed as she walked up and down in front of my house. Belle was frowning to herself.

"Trish, I told you. I don't care what he says, besides I deserved it, he's Austin moon, and I'm just, me. We shouldn't even try to get along" I replied. She scoffed and we all sat on the end of my porch.

"Ally you're amazing. He just doesn't know you, trust me if he ever got to know you, he'd eat his own words. Anyway what happened before you started screaming at each other?" belle said as she put a comforting arm around me. I smiled back.

"Thanks Belle. Um, we were, getting along." I mumbled. Trish shot me a confused and disgusted look. "He was really upset, so I walked over to comfort him, at first he told me to get lost, then I told him how even when my intentions are right he treats me like crap, he asked me to stay. And we talked for a while, I asked him if he actually though he wasn't worthy enough for her, he said he thought he had to live up to her expectations, buy her everything, take her out, tell her she beautiful and all that. I told him it sounds like she was taking advantage of him and he flipped out and started yelling at me about how they don't need a freak trying to out stuff in their heads. Then he said nobody would ever love a fat, ugly freak like me." I told them. They sat there in shock.

"I can't believe you got along with pretty boy for even 1 minute, that's just freaky, and then he has to go ruin it!" Trish said with an annoyed expression.

I rolled my eyes at her "it's not a romance movie Trish, what do you think would happen? We get along and live happily ever after. Fairytales are just a load of rubbish" I said with a shrug. She grinned at me.

"It could happen, Ally" she replied while sniggering along with belle. I faked throwing up and stood up, dusting my dress off as I did.

My eyes widened as familiar car came driving up the road. I spun towards Trish and Belle. I pulled them up by the arm and pushed them into a bush. "Stay in there, or else." I spat.

Trish scoffed "Or else what?" she said as she poked her head out of the bush. I shook my head at her and sat on my porch again. Like I knew it would, the car stopped a few meters away from me, the window rolling down revealing pretty boy and Cassidy.

Cassidy glared at me, plastic cup in her hands. "Thanks for looking after _my_ boyfriend, freak. But if you ever try anything on him again. They'll be consequences" she snapped. I frowned. Keep calm Ally! Keep clam. I kept my mouth tightly shut and just simply nodded. She smirked at me, she opened the car door. I saw pretty boy's hand grab for her arm but she was already out. She walked slowly towards me, an evil smirk on her face. I stood up slowly and she became face-to-face with me.

She looked me from head to toe. "You really think Austin would like a loser like you?" she asked, venom in her voice. I looked down at the floor then back up at her, no words were able to escape my mouth. She smirked wider "Obviously not, Austin's got standards he doesn't go for short, fat, ugly weirdo's. He goes for girls like me" she hissed. My eyes watched as she pulled the lid off her drink, slowly lifting it. I knew what was coming next. She poured the entire drink over my head slowly leaning to my ear as she did so. "So keep away" she whispered into my ear. She skipped back to the car and kissed pretty boy. He turned to face me, a lopsided grin on his face and then drove away. There was movement coming from the bush.

Trish and Belle came running out and confronted me. "that bitch. Ally, please let me just teach her a lesson this one time" Trish begged me. I shook my head, too embarrassed and hurt to laugh.

"Just please, stay out of it." I mumbled and walked back into my house, closing the door behind me. I heard Trish and belle say something about leaving me to rest and then footsteps walking away. I pushed my back against the door and slid down it, pulling my knees to my chest. I hid my face in my knees and sobbed into them quietly to make sure my father couldn't hear me. Things really felt like they couldn't get any worse, but then again, I had school tomorrow, with every other person who thinks it's fun to torment me.

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**Ta-da! :D**


	6. I didn't have sex with Austin Moon!

**Okay, I just want to say I live in England (Hey!) so the time difference is pretty awkward, that's why my updates are all over the place, but I'll try to update every other day at least :)**** Thanks **

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_~chapter 6: I didn't have sex with Austin moon!~_

I took a deep breath to calm myself down and walked into the school grounds. The whispers soon began. I clenched my fists tightly around the books in my hands at the rumours that were spread over night that Trish had warned me about. A group of 3 girls came over to me, giggling like idiots.

"Hey, whatever your name is, is it really true that you tried it on with Austin Moon?" a small brunette asked me.

Ew, Ew, Ew, Ewww! I think I just threw up. That's disgusting.

"Yeah, apparently you tried to have sex with him, in his car. We always knew you were a freak, I never knew you were a slut too" the girl on the left of the brunette said as she shot me a dirty look.

"I did not have sex with Austin Moon!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I felt heat quickly rise from my neck into my face. Everyone had stopped what they were doing, now looking at me. The girls in front of me now began sniggering. They pushed past, knocking the books out of my hands. I bent down miserably and began to pick them up, a pair of hands came down and helped me. We both stood up and they pasted me the rest of the books.

Is smiled widely. "T-tha-thanks" I stammered. He smiled brightly at me, showing off his perfect white teeth.

"Nice to see you again, Ally" he said with a small wave.

Oh my gosh, it's Dallas! I haven't seen him since a year ago.

Oh right, Dallas is Austin's cousin, if that's even possible. Dallas is sweet, kind, caring, handsome, he's just so perfect and pretty boy's just…Ugh and more Ugh! He normally visits during the summer when his mom goes on vacation, he stops at pretty boy's house. I developed a crush on Dallas when I first met him, 2 years ago when he told me he liked my skirt, then Pretty boy poured his ice cream on it. I make a complete fool of myself around him, it's not a pretty picture.

"Ally, did you hear me, Ally?" he waved his hand in front of my face breaking my concentration. I blushed.

"Sorry Dallas, I was just thinking about you…I mean! Um n-never mind" I mentally slapped myself. I'm such a geek!

He laughed. "You're cute when you blush" he said with a grin. I blushed deeper and started swaying on the spot. Okay, this is going well. Whatever you do, _don't chew your hair! _

"so-so how long are you in Miami for this year, Ally? No Dallas, no Ally!" Dang it! He laughed again and we started walking into the school building together.

"6 months this year, my mom wanted extra time 'to herself' I don't know, I think she just finds me annoying" he replied with a shrug. I giggled dramatically, and…snorted. Smooth.

"I gotta' get to class. Um I'll see you around" I said with a small wave. He waved back and walked in the opposite direction. I sighed and slapped my forehead.

"Well, that was just sad" a voice behind me said. I screamed and turned around sharply to see who the person was. Ugh! Pretty boy, not again.

"That's funny, I don't really remember asking for your opinion" I said with fake confusion. He rolled his eyes at me and smirked.

"So you like my cousin, he'd be perfect for you, he's a loser too" he spat. I scoffed and touched my heart with fake hurt.

"And to think. We were getting along ever so nicely yesterday, jerk" I argued back. He raised a brow at me and his smirk widened.

"Yeah, too bad you ruined it by making a move on me, freak" He winked at me, Ew. My smiled disappeared and my breathing quickened with anger.

"You started those rumours?! You-you- why the heck did you start them you sick, twisted, annoying Prick!" Ally Language! I mentally scolded myself. What's wrong with me today?

He shrugged. "It was funny. Besides since when did you care what people care or say about you? Loser" he asked eyeing me up and down.

I scoffed "Asshole" I murmured to myself while turning around and walking away. i really should work on my language.

* * *

"Good morning, Ally" miss Swallow said with a warm smile. I sat at the front and smiled back. I got my books out and sighed. "How are things?" she asked me hesitantly, looking sympathetic.

I shrugged "Okay, I'm feeling a lot better than normal, thank you for your concern" Ally dawson you lair! She smiled and nodded, turning her head back to the laptop on her desk.

The bell rang and students came flooding in. Cassidy walked in her hand tightly gripped to pretty boy's. She stopped besides me desk. "Stop staring at what pretty looks like" she snapped and walked to the back. I leaned back into my chair and sighed deeply.

"Okay class, today I want you all to…" miss swallow began. I reached for my book and began writing in it.

_Dear diary, _

_Just kill me now. Seriously bury me alive, shoot me, stab me I don't care. Nothing can make this day get any worse. actually, scrap that whenever I say that line, it ends up worse._

_There's a stupid rumour going around about me, saying I tried to sleep with…I can't even write it. Pretty boy. Worst thing is; he started it! What the fish sticks is that about? He needs medical help. Immediately. _

_OH MY GOSH! **(insert high pitch girly scream)** Dallas came back today! He's even more perfect than last year. How does he get more good-looking every year? But like always, I made an absolute idiot of myself. It started off fine, some Barbie dolls asked me if I did really try to get in pretty boy's pants, so I screamed at them, they barged into me knocking my books to the floor and he helped me collect them! He's such a gentleman. Oh, then I got into this deep thought about how cute he is and he broke me out of it, I told him I was thinking about him. So not cool. Then I called him Ally, hold on it gets worse. Then, wait for it, I laughed so hard I snorted. I'm so ashamed. Never speak of this again. _

_Anyway then pretty boy came and told me it was him who started the rumour! He's such a…pretty boy…yeah, I've sworn too much today. I really don't get what his problem is though. Oh and now his little slut of a girlfriend is joining in, perfect right! Anyway the bell just rang, later!_

_Lots of love, Ally xx_

* * *

How did I do it? How did I manage to go the rest of the day without seeing pretty boy and his queen? Actually I don't care I'm just glad I did. I smiled and walked up to Trish and Belle. We were about to set off home when I heard someone calling my name. I spun around to see Dallas running up to us. He stopped and caught his breath. Breathe Ally, just breathe and act calm.

"Hey Ally, I was just wondering if you wanted to come over tomorrow? We could hang out after school and you could stop for dinner" he asked.

Say no. It's a school night, and you have to look after dad. Plus **_it_** will be there.

Just. Say. No!

"I'm sorry Dallas but tomorrows-" I began but Trish pushed me aside and butted in.

"Tomorrows perfect, she'd love to" she said as she patted me on the back, quite hard I'll add. I frowned and glared at Trish.

"Awesome! I'll meet you here tomorrow after school, See you later girls" he walked off with the biggest smile on his face I'd ever seen. I turned towards Trish.

"Why? Just why Trish, I already spend half the day with his annoying, um, son-a-female-dog, cousin. I don't need extra torturing time." I pleaded, she grinned and shook her head.

"Maybe you'll get along again and end up falling in love" she remarked. Wait for it, wait...

"Aww, that would be so cute. Austin and Ally sitting in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g" belle joined in, poking my arm playfully. I huffed and walked in front of them.

"Ally, think about it, you've had a major crush on Dallas for 2 years now, and this is him finally asking you out, isn't another 3-4 hours of Austin torture worth it?" Belle asked as she caught up to me.

I sighed and nodded in defeat. "fine, I'll go. You win" I mumbled. I saw Trish and Belle high-five each other behind me. Damn them both.

Why me? Oh well I'll get to spend time with Dallas. Who knows maybe this will go well, then again, I'm known to attract bad look.

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**I'm really excited for the next chapter:D haha**


	7. Causing trouble in the Moon's house

**Hey! Thanks for all the reviews you guys are awesome**

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_~chapter 7: Causing trouble in the Moon's house~_

"I'm going round to a friends tonight dad, will you be okay without me?" I asked picking up my books. He smiled and nodded at me.

"I'll be fine. Who's this friend? A boy?" he asked, rising his left brown at me. I blushed and nodded slightly. He laughed "Good, you need to start bringing boys home so I can warn them off like regular dads" I giggled and again and kissed his cheek.

"Okay dad, whatever you say. See you later" I waved and shut the door quietly. I walked down stairs and opened the front door greeted by Trish. "Why are you here?" I asked her, locking the door behind me. She shrugged.

"Belle's ill, and I needed someone to walk with, do I really need a reason to hang with my best friend?" she asked cockily. I smiled and we continued to walk together. "So…you excited for tonight?" she asked poking my arm repeatedly.

"if I say yes will you stop poking me?" I stressed. She nodded with an excited grin. I sighed "then yes, I can't believe your making me go to pretty boy's house" I said with a glare. She smirked.

"Ally, come on give the guy a break, he was nice to you once, maybe it'll happen again" she fought back. I rolled my eyes.

"I seriously doubt it, Trish" I mumbled under my breath. "crap, i have work tonight!" i said.

she smiled "Relax Ally, i called and they said it was fine" i sighed and relaxed

"so, what's Belle ill with?" I asked as we turned the corner, now facing the school building.

She shrugged "I don't know, maybe it's just a head cold or something, she didn't look too ill, but she wanted me to wish you luck for tonight and I quote 'decide who you want now' whatever that means"

I shrugged along with her "whatever, see you after school" I said as I slowed down so she could get a head start. She smiled and walked into the school. I continued to walk into the school grounds.

"Hey, freak" Cassidy said while blocking my path way with her group of friends. I remained silent "look, thing. I don't give a shit what you say, something is going on between you and Austin. He's now saying how I should leave the crap to him to give to you" she screwed up hr face looking confused. "So loser, whatever your doing to steal him, don't. if you even try to talk to him, I'll make your life 10 times worse than it already is got it?!" she snapped. She looked down to the book in my hands and quickly grabbed it off me.

"Hey, give it back. Please!" I pleaded she just laughed and opened it to a random page, she skipped through it and smiled and kept it open on a page.

"Today was the day I met Austin moon" she read aloud. I tried to take the book from her hands but one of her friends stopped me. A crowed now gathered around us. "at first I thought he was cute. His hair is this amazing bright blonde colour and it flops over his left eye perfectly and his eyes, are a perfect shade of brown, almost hazel but just a little darker. He truly is gorgeous" she read with a laugh. The whole crowd was now laughing along. She slowly ripped out the page and through it to the ground. She turned to the last entry. "Wow, she's written a song, Sing it!" she said while pushing the book into my chest.

I gulped "I have stage fright, I can't" I whispered. She rolled her eyes at me then glared deeply.

"I said sing fatty" she hissed and took a step closer to me "or else I'll show Austin how 'gorgeous' you think he is" she said with a smirk. I lifted up the book and looked at the song. It read 'without you'. I felt tears sting my eyes and my body began to shake.

There's no way I can make it without you

Do it without you

Be here without you

It's no fun when you're doing it solo

With you it's like, woah

Yeah and I know Cause I own this dream

Cause I got you with me

There's no way I can make it without you

Do it without you

Be here without you

I sung it softly and had my eyes closed the whole time. I wrote that song for my dad, when he first fell ill. I opened my eyes slowly. Cassidy took my book again and ripped out the page.

"wow, so little miss nut job can sing, badly. Loser" she spat. She pushed me hard in the shoulders so I tripped and fell backwards onto the ground. She laughed and bent down to my level. "stay away from him, or else" she through the book down to me, it landing next to me. She walked off laughing with her friends. Everyone walked away mumbling. I stood up and picked up the papers. A hand-picked up my book. I stood up straight and smiled, thinking it was Dallas again. My smile faded. Freakin' pretty boy again.

I quickly snatched the book from his hands. "What do you want?" I snapped. He glared ever so slightly at me.

"what so now _I_ can't help _you_?" he asked, crossing his arms tightly across his chest. I rolled my eyes.

"Whatever, just go run to your little girlfriend" I mumbled angrily while walking off, trying to flatten out the scrunched up paper. He huffed and ran up to me, walking along side of me.

"What is your problem? I try to get along with you, you throw it back in my face. Do you like being treated like shit or something?" he asked, pushing his hands into his jean pockets. I suddenly stopped and turned to face him.

"My problem? I don't have a problem. In fact it's you who has the problem. One minute you hate, the next you totally ignore my existence then pull a stupid prank on me, then your trying to get along with me. I really don't get you. Just make up your mind for one second. Why Can't you just leave me alone for once. Or just keep hating me at least I'd know what to expect from you. You know, I really hate you Austin Moon" I screamed at him.

He started blankly at me. Then his face hardened and he shoved his hands deeper into his pockets. "You want me to carry on treating you like crap? Fine I will. But don't go crying to anyone when you get sick of it. And just for the record, I really hate you too" he snapped back and stormed off. Okay, ouch. That stung a bit. Wait, I shouldn't care what he thinks. Why is he so complicated. I sighed and made my way into the school building.

* * *

I stood outside and waited for Dallas. I could feel my heart beat through my ears. It was ridicules how nervous I was. "Hey Ally" he greeted cheerfully as he walked up to me. I smiled and walked the rest of the way to him. "let's go" he said as he took my hand and dragged me off. I smiled at the sudden contact and followed him to the house. We got there in no time at all. Dallas almost ran dragging me with him since he was still holding my hand, I'm not complaining or anything.

"Who's this, Dallas? I didn't know you had a girlfriend!" a fair-haired blonde woman, that I assume is pretty boys mom said. I blushed a deep red.

"No Mimi, she's just a really good friend, this is Ally. Ally this is Austin's mother, Mimi" he introduced us. She gave me a warm-hearted smile.

"Nice to meet you at last Mrs moon" I said as politely as possible. She laughed.

"Pease Ally, call me Mimi, and it's nice to meet you too, put a face to the name" she replied while drying a dish. I smiled to myself. Dallas talks about me? Keep calm, keep calm.

"Ally, you can head up to my room, I just need to talk to Mimi, up the stairs first door on the right" he pointed to the big flight of stairs in the hallway. I nodded and climbed the stairs. I reached the top and looked around. Every room had a letter on it. What did Dallas say? First door on the left. I looked at the blue door with a giant 'D' in golden letters. I'm about to enter Dallas' room!

I turned the door handle and walked in. "hey de-what the fuck!" yelled pretty boy. We both started at each other, mouths dropped open. My eyes travelled down to his chest, he was shirtless…Oh my goodness. I smiled nervously. "what the fuck are you doing in my house? Are you stalking me?" he yelled at me.

I huffed "Dallas invited me, actually. Why are you in his room?" I asked, my eyes still staring at his toned body. He rolled his eyes.

"This is my room, genius" he replied. I frowned in confused.

"It has a 'd' on th freakin' door. d or Dallas! It's his room" I argued back.

He sat on his bed "No, the 'd' is for, do not enter." he said in a 'duh' voice. D for dickhead more like. I shook my head in confusion and pity.

"what kind of person talks like that?! For get it! It's just my luck, now Cassidy will be screaming about how I into your room and…" I looked at him for head to toe and cringed.

"Don't worry about hr, I wont tell her and I'm pretty sure you wont. Nobody has to know you were in here" he said while he finally took the shirt of his bed and put it on.

"Why are you in Austin's room" Dallas' voice spoke from behind me. Oh for crying out loud. I spun around and smiled sweetly at him.

"Hey Dallas, I was just, I was you see, um…" I trailed off and looked towards pretty boy for help.

"she waned to know if I had any condoms" he said with a small smirk. My mouth dropped open again while I shot a death glare at him. If only looks could kill.

Dallas shook his head and, laughed? "you're a funny girl, Ally. That's why I like you, you're different. Come on!" he said and took my head again. I blushed behind him. Then turned to pretty boy who was rolling his eyes and fake gagging. I quickly shot him 'the finger' before I was dragged off by Dallas.

We spent a lot of time just talking and finding out a lot about each other. Dallas' room was a lot smaller than pretty boy's, figures. "I'm just going to use the bathroom" Dallas said as he got up. I nodded and watched him leave the room.

I stood up as I heard the faint sound of a guitar. I hesitated but opened the door and followed the sound. I followed to the familiar blue door. I pressed my ear against it and listened carefully. I lifted my hand to the doorknob and turned it, opening it a crack. I peered through and watched as he played the guitar on his bed. He seemed to be unaware of any of his surroundings, like he was in a trance or something. I smiled and watched as he played, quite well i must admit. I leant on the door a little and watched closely. The door soon flung open and sent me flying onto his bedroom floor.

He looked up from the guitar. "come for more condoms?" he asked in a mocking voice. I rolled my eyes and stood up.

"Where did you learn to play like that?" I asked ignoring his other question. He glanced downwards at the guitar then put it down.

"does it really matter? What do you want?" he snapped.

"Yes, It matters. I mean your amazing, I've never seen anyone play like that, I took professional lessons for 7 years and I can't even play like that! Why do you have to be so damn good at everything?" I ranted as I walked around the room. I looked towards him and I saw him grinning. Great I probably just added more to his gigantic ego.

"I taught myself when I was 10. My parents wouldn't pay for lessons since they don't think music is a good career choice." he answered shrugging.

"Cant you suck at something?" I asked, getting more annoyed by the second. He raised a brow at me.

"what are you talking about, freak?" he asked, standing up from his bed.

I groaned "Seriously! You're popular. You're hot. You're smart. You can play the guitar" I started but he cut me off.

"actually I can play any musical instrument, and I sing" he bragged with a gleaming grin. He looked towards the guitar pick in his hands, not paying attention. I gritted my teeth.

"see what I mean? why are you so perfect?!" my eyes widened when I realized what I just said. He looked up at me with wide eyes too. I laughed nervously. "I don't mean perfect, perfect. I mean your good at everything." his eyes came back to their normal size and he shrugged again.

"Here we go again. We get along a bit. It's going fine then we start to argue about the littlest things" I yelled really frustrated now.

"Don't blame me, you're the one that said you wanted me to hate you, I tried to get along with you but your just impossible" he yelled back. We were now inches away, screaming in each others faces. I could smell his fresh mint breath and his strong cologne.

"People like us don't get along, we're _meant _to hate each other." I argued back. He scoffed and flipped his hair away from his eyes.

"Whatever you want freak" he mumbled and turned back to the guitar pick. I took it from him and put into my pocket.

"you're so annoying! At least try to listen to me!" I screamed.

He laughed sarcastically. "why? You never have the decency to listen to what I have to say. It's always about you isn't it, your just like Cassidy, you know!" he yelled.

I raised my clenched fist and punched him in the middle of his nose, I heard a satisfying 'click' as he hissed in pain. He looked up and I saw the blood pouring from his nose. I'd broken it.

"Don't ever compare me to that bitch again!" I said and stormed out of his room down the stairs.

Dallas came running up to me. "Are you okay? I heard loads of shouting" he asked looking worried. I smiled and nodded.

"sorry Dallas, I'm going to have to go, it was a big mistake coming here when he's up stairs. Thanks for inviting me, I had a great time." I kissed his cheek lightly. "tell him I'm sorry I lashed out" I mumbled. He nodded and walked me to the front door.

"Let me walk you!" he said as I walked out of the door.

I shook my head "I need to think, thanks for everything Dallas, see you at school" I quickly walked away from the house. I stopped and looked towards pretty boy's window. He was stood there staring at me with a tissue to his nose. I sighed and carried on walking. I felt tears running down my face. I felt so awful. I've never hit anyone before. I'll have to apologise next time I see him even if he probably wont even talk to me after this.


	8. Drama, drama, drama

**This chapter contains a little violence, just to warn you, you might get a little pissed off:)**

* * *

_~chapter 8: drama, drama, drama~_

"Did you guys here about, Austin?" Trish said excitedly. Belle nodded and grinned.

"He got his nose broken by some guy" she replied. I hid my face from them both and carried on walking the way to school.

"Yeah, he got into a fight and this guy broke his nose, but apparently he won anyway" Trish said with a disappointed face. I scoffed.

"Yeah right, I bet he couldn't hurt a fly" I said with a fake laugh. I _still _felt bad for what I did, even though he deserved it. Comparing me to that stupid slut of his.

"He works out, right. I heard he's pretty buff. I kinda wish I could see it" Belle said with a small smirk. I rolled my eyes; the picture of him shirtless from last night ran though my head.

Trish tapped me on the shoulder "Hey, did you here me? The talent show is in 2 weeks" she shot me a cheesy smile.

I huffed loudly "no. I'm not doing it, I won't even be able to get on the stage let alone sing in front of everyone." I said sternly.

"Okay, I'm not going to force you. But your wasting your talent, see you later" she said while she pulled me into a hug.

"See you, Ally" belle said with a wave. I waved back and waited for them to enter the school again. I placed my hands into my pockets; I pulled out a small red guitar pick. Oh crap, I must've taken Pretty boy's guitar pick home by mistake before I punched him. I placed it back into my pocket. I'll give it back to him when I see him.

I sighed and walked into the grounds.

I continued to walk, waiting for the whispers and insults. I looked up confused to see everyone trying not to make eye contact with me. Some were even stepping out of the way for me. What's going on? I walked on into the building and the same happened again. People moved out of my way, some tried not to make eye contact and some stared at me with fear in their eyes. I frowned and walked up to my locker. I opened it and took out my books, closing it after.

I felt myself blushing from the eyes on me. I quickly walked off to my first class.

* * *

"Morning Ally" Mrs Swallow greeted me with a lazy smile. I smiled back and nodded. I sat in my seat in the front row and got my things ready.

"How are you today?" she asked, obviously trying to fill the awkward silence.

I shrugged "okay, I guess. A little…confused but I'm good" I replied.

She nodded and stood up "I just have to go check something, I'll be back in a few minutes" she said then walked out of the classroom. I placed my head onto the desk and sighed deeply. I shot my head up when the classroom door slammed shut. I gulped slowly when I saw Cassidy glaring right at me. I stood up from my seat and she walked towards me.

We became face-to-face. "Hello, bitch" she spat with venom in her voice. I took a step backwards, truly petrified. She smirked at me "I heard what you did to my Austy. You fucking little slut, how dare you break his nose, because of you he couldn't come to school today, everyone's talking about it!" she screamed. I winced at her high pitched voice. Oh, that's why people were moving out of the way.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to-" I started but she struck my cheek, hard. I felt the stinging sensation come moments after and tears filling my eyes in seconds.

"I didn't say you could speak! We're gonna' play a little game, fatty Ally. Whenever you do something I don't like, I'll hit you, and the hits get harder and harder. Got it?" she asked. I looked downwards. She slapped the other side of my cheek harder than last time, making me yell in pain. "Fucking answer me" she yelled.

"y-yes" I stammered. She scoffed and tapped her bony finger on her cheek.

"Right, why did you hurt Austin, I want a truthful answer" she said as she crossed her arms, looking exactly like pretty boy.

I sniffed "I um, he-" she stuck her long nails into my cheek and slowly pulled them across.

"Tell me. Or I'll rip your ugly, pale skin off" she threatened.

My breath kept hitching in my throat as I tried to get my breathing back to normal "He said I was l-like you" I whispered. Her nails dragged across more, getting deeper.

She took her hand off my cheek "This was fun, no wonder Austin did this for so long. If you tell anyone I did this, I'll break your nose too, I have a sweet girl image to protect" she said while annoyingly flipping her hair. I nodded slowly. She smiled and quickly walked off. As soon as she left my knees collapsed and I fell to the floor in tears. The salty water burned the fresh cuts on my cheek. I felt a pair of arms hug me tightly. I looked up to see Dallas with worry all over his face. His eyes widened when he saw the bloody cuts.

"Who the fuck did this, Ally?" he whispered to me. I looked down.

"I did it to myself" I lied.

He rolled his eyes but he lifted me from the floor, holding onto me tight. I berried my head into his chest and cried harder. He stroked my back slowly. We both turned towards the door when we heard footsteps.

"Oh my goodness, Ally darling, what happened?" Mrs Swallow asked running up to me. I wiped my cheek steadily, trying not to touch the cuts.

"I-I I um I did to myself" I whispered. She pulled me into a comforting hug.

"Dallas, can you take her to see the school nurse, please?" she asked, pulling away from the hug. Dallas nodded and motioned me to follow him. I did as told and followed him out of the classroom, keeping my head down. He led me to the outside of the school.

"Dallas? The nurse's office is that way" I pointed in the opposite direction to where we were heading. I took a hold of my hand and dragged me onwards.

"I'm taking you to the moon's house, you don't need everyone asking what happened all day, and you need to rest" he said dragging me out of the school grounds. I tried to pull back but he was too strong.

"I can't ditch! I've ever done that before in my life" I argued, feeling nauseous. He pulled harder.

"Well it's never too late to try" he yelled at me, making me shut up.

* * *

We arrived at the moon's house. I looked up at it, before Dallas opened the door and dragged me in, me trying to get out of his grasp. "Dallas! What are you doing home? And why does it look like you're kidnapping Ally?" Mimi asked as she poked her head from thee kitchen door.

I kept my head down trying to hide my ugly scars. Dallas led me to the kitchen. "Look!" he hissed as he lifted my face reviling the gashes. Mimi quickly looked around the room.

"Why didn't you clean them first, Dallas! They could've gotten infected." she yelled while wiping the cuts with a wet cloth. I hissed loudly in pain and she shot me an apologetic smile.

"Sorry Mimi I didn't want the school asking questions, she already gets a load of crap from…people" he replied watching her clean the cuts on my face. I'm guessing Mimi thinks pretty boy is some kind of saint.

I heard loud footsteps storming down the stairs and I turned my face away from the direction of the door. I knew exactly who was coming and I couldn't face him, not yet.

"What's all the noise?!" his voice yelled into the kitchen.

"Fuck off Austin and go back upstairs" Dallas yelled back at him "Like she wants to see you at the moment" he spat.

"Dallas! Language! Austin sweetie, be a dear and help me sort out Ally while Dallas calms down" Mimi said in a genital voice. I mentally cursed. I heard him sigh and walk up to us.

Mimi turned my face towards her again. I looked at the large split on his nose and guilt raised in my gut making me feel more nauseous. I saw his eyes quickly look away from the wound, then they glanced back and didn't move for a while.

"Well, help me then!" Mimi said impatiently holding out the cloth. He took it and causally lifted it to my face, dabbing it lightly. We avoided eye contact.

He handed the cloth back to her and took a few steps backwards. "Thanks" I murmured.

"So, who did this?" Mimi asked, throwing the cloth into a basket.

Dallas scoffed. "Apparently she did it to herself, bullshit!" he screamed getting wound up again. I closed my eyes tightly and hugged my self with my left arm.

"Ally, honey. Who did this?" she asked me quietly, bending down to my level. "Do they normally do this stuff to you" I nodded slowly. "Have you told anyone before?" I shook my head. "Why did they do this to you?" I glanced at pretty boy. His eyes met mine and I quickly looked away. I shrugged.

Dallas scoffed again "Why wont she tell us, so I can fucking kill the person!" he yelled. I took my bag and lifted it onto my back.

"Thanks, I'm going to go home now" I whispered. Mimi frowned at me but smiled and nodded seconds later.

"My pleasure darling, if this person does anything like this again, please tell someone" she pleaded. I nodded shyly. She patted my back. Pretty boy suddenly left the room without a word and stormed up the stairs, no one dwelled on it though.

I walked up to Dallas and smiled at him "Thank you, Dal" I said while blushing a little. He nodded and his face softened.

He bent down and put his lips next to my ear "You still look pretty" he whispered. Blushed furiously and bit my lip, trying not to let my smile widen. He winked at me and led me to the front door.

"Oh, one second!" I said quickly and ran up the stairs to pretty boy's room. I knocked on the door. A muffled voice came from the room and I opened the door. I saw him quickly throw his phone onto his bed and he looked at me.

"What?" he snapped. I frowned wondering what made his mood go so low. I reached into my pocket and took out the guitar pick.

"I accidentally took it yesterday before I…" I looked at his nose and gave him half a smile. He took the guitar pick and placed it onto his desk.

"um, thanks" he mumbled awkwardly. I nodded and walked towards the door then turned around to face him.

"I really am sorry about your nose" I said in a small voice.

He shrugged not looking at me. "Whatever" he replied lazily and threw himself onto his bed. I sighed and walked out of his room, closing the door behind me. I walked down the stairs and smiled at Dallas who was stood at the bottom.

"Do you want me to-" he started I cut him off, kissing his cheek quickly.

"I don't need you to walk me home" I said with an embarrassed smile. He grinned and nodded, opening the door for me. I smiled and walked out of the house. I began to walk home when I heard my phone buzz.

I took it out and read the message.

'_You better be back at school tomorrow you fat little freak!' _it read.

I sighed and put my phone back into my pocket. I really wasn't in the mood for anything. I pulled my hood over my head to hide my face.

I arrived home and opened the door to see my dad, yet again trying to get down the stairs. I huffed and ran up to him. "Dad! You're not strong enough!" I yelled and pulled him back up the stairs. I pushed him back onto the bed.

He glared at me. "Why aren't you in school, young lady?" he asked. I gritted my teeth.

"It's called ditching, dad!" I yelled.

"No daughter of mine ditches! Why on earth would you ditch for? You love school!" he protested. I laughed sarcastically.

"No dad, I hate school. I'm bullied everyday by the entire school. I'm not popular, I only have 2 friends. The whole school hates me because of this guy; he's the worst of them all. One minute he's this nice, decant, down to earth guy, then the next he's this horrible jerk who tortures me everyday. And his girlfriend has now started it too. She's actually worse than him. But the one thing that totally annoys me is that no matter how much this guy tortures me, if he calls me a freak, nut job, fat, ugly, loser or whatever no matter what he does to me I can't help but find him completely attractive, I can't help but stare at him in awe every single fucking day! He's perfect. And I spend every day asking myself what I ever did to deserve any of this." I screamed, tears pouring down my injured cheeks. My dad sat there looking at me, a shocked expression on his face.

I huffed and stormed out of the room. "Where are you going?" he yelled at me.

"Out!" I yelled back and slammed the front door shut. From then I ran, as fast I could. I ran until I saw the same house I was in moments ago. I knocked on the door loudly and tapped my foot impatiently. The door swung open to revile Dallas. I walked up to the door and grabbed his collar, crashing his lips into mine. He kissed back instantly then he pulled away looking at me, worriedly.

"Sorry" I mumbled and miserably walked away.


	9. Lets start anew

**I really want to thank you individually but that would take up time and I bet you just wanna get to the story, Auslly in this chapter, a hell of a lot more than last time!**

* * *

_~chapter 9: lets start anew~_

I walked up to the gates of 'make a home'. School had finished about an hour ago, but luckily nobody saw me. I took a deep breath and lifted the ant pottery on the floor, taking the key out from underneath it. I opened the door and walked in to the dark, empty building. I closed the door behind me and walked over to Trevor's cage.

He began barking at me, trying to escape. I laughed and let him out of the cage, it resulting with me ending up on the floor, him attacking me with his tongue. I pushed him off me and sat up right. I flew my arms around his soft neck and cried into his fur. I clung onto him like my life depended on it until i couldn't crying anymore. I pulled away and wiped my cheek. "Everything's just getting worse, Trevor. I really don't know what to do. I didn't mean to hurt him, I didn't mean to tell my dad everything, I just wish sometimes I could keep my fat mouth shut. Everyone's right about me" I whispered to the dog in front of me. "I wish you could understand me and talk back, I really need someone right now" I let another tear fall and I got up and put Trevor back into his cage. I walked out of the building and locked up. I placed the key back under the ant and walked home.

I opened the front door and closed it slowly behind me. I climbed the stairs and walked into my dad's room. He sat there and stared at me. "Look, dad. I'm sorry for yelling at you. I had a bad day, first I was petting this stray cat and it attacked me" I showed him the starches on my face. "So then the teachers sent me home, even though I didn't want to go." he sat there in silence "I lied about getting bullied. I wanted you to feel sorry for me. I shouldn't have done it, I'm sorry" I mumbled. He sighed and held his arms out. I quickly ran into them and hugged him tightly he held me back just as tight. I hated lying to him, but if he was happy, I was happy.

We staying in that position for a while until we both pulled away. "You shouldn't have lied to me Ally. But I'll let it slide. How's your cheek?" he asked softly.

I touched my cheek lightly "A little sore but getting better" I replied. He smiled.

"Good, will you be allowed back to school tomorrow?" he asked.

I shivered remembering the threatening text Cassidy sent me. "um, y-yeah, can't wait" I lied. He nodded and pulled the covers over his self.

"Bye dad" I whispered and walked out of the door. I quickly grabbed my things and set off to sonic boom for my shift.

* * *

I arrived and opened the door of the shop and walked into the room. I threw my stuff under the desk and rested my elbows on top of it, waiting for the long shift to be over. I took out my phone…_3 new messages._

I read the first text '_Ally, we really need to talk about that kiss - Dallas x'_ Aw, he put a kiss!

I tapped the buttons and texted him back '_Hey Dallas, I know. Maybe we could talk at school tomorrow? I'll meet you at the school gates X'_

It took him almost a millisecond to reply _'Awesome! School gates, see you there. Oh and Ally, you're a good kisser ;) x' _

I smiled, biting my lip and read the second one. '_Ally where the hell were you today? Cassidy has been saying some super shit about you, is it true your secretly dating pretty boy? Fucking call me a.s.a.p!_' Trish seemed pretty pissed off at me.

I sighed and read the third one. '_what the fuck, Ally. Trish is going mental, saying how she wants nothing to do with you? What did you do? Call me, Ally. I'm worried - Belle x'_

I groaned and threw my phone into the desk, it landing with a bang. "Someone's happy" pretty boy said sarcastically as he walked into the store.

"Fuck you, pretty boy" I replied simply. He began to roll his eyes but he stopped himself.

"Look, I want to…thank you properly. For giving me back my guitar pick. I deserved that punch, your nothing like that bitch" he mumbled.

I raised my left brow at him "Who's forcing you to do this, your mom?" I asked.

He grinned and shook his head "No, she doesn't even know I'm here. I came here on my own accord. " he said softly_. _

I narrowed my eyes suspiciously at him "Really?" I asked. He nodded with a light shrug. I couldn't help but smile. "wow, I never thought you'd ever surprise me…in a good way. I stand corrected." I replied, the smile still across my face. I cleared my throat "If you don't mind me asking, what did she do this time?" I asked.

He chuckled "The usual, that guy she cheated on me with for 5 months. Well she told me she broke it off with him. I walked in on them, last night" he replied, walking over and leaning on the desk.

"I'm really sorry, I know I apologise a lot, but this time, you deserve it." I said encouragingly. He shrugged again. "How did you know I worked here?" his eyes lightened up a little.

"I asked your little secret friend that everyone knows about, Tasha" he said with a wink. I rolled my eyes playfully.

"Her name's Trish, but she's not my friend anymore, I mean we tried to hide it so she wouldn't get the stuff I did, I pushed her away. Then Cassidy said something to her that apparently made her hate me. Now it's just me. Ally Dawson, the loser" I said with a sarcastic thumbs up.

He sighed and did his annoying hair-flipping thing. "How did you not end up killing me?" he asked in a serious but also joking voice.

I smiled and leaned on the desk next to him "I guess I just tried to ignore you. It wasn't just you, everyone had one thing to say. I got used to it after a while. My heart is kinda like grass, different people stand on it but it still springs back, but it's also very easy to rip…that was way cheesy, right?" I blushed and hid my face.

He just laughed and nodded at me. "Maybe we should get a fresh start, start anew" he said and stood up. I did the same and nodded.

"I'd like that" I replied.

He held out his hand "Austin Moon" he said in a polite voice.

I giggled and took his hand and shook it "Ally Dawson" I replied the same way.

Finally, maybe things between me and Austin could actually get better.


	10. Too many secrets to keep

**Hey again, here's chapter 10**

* * *

_~Chapter 10: Too many secrets to keep~_

"What, so you're cool with him now, or what?" Belle asked sounding confused.

I sighed down the phone "Yes, Belle me and pretty boy are in good terms, I'm sure of it." I replied. She scoffed.

"Ally, he said he can't be seen with you, that doesn't sound like he's dying to make things better between you" she said.

I frowned "You weren't there, Belle! I trust him"

**-flashback-**

_I sighed "so, what actually made you want to apologise to me?" I asked him. He thought for a while._

"_I got tired of trying to annoy you all the time, it's hard work you know, your pretty stubborn" he said pushing me a little._

_I laughed "Right, well you did a good job at annoying me, I must Say" he smirked. "So, why did you hate me, then?" I asked sheepishly. _

_He looked down to the floor "It started off when everyone started to compare me to you. 5 years ago, when we were 11, you were new and everyone said how smart you were, I was kinda jealous I guess. Then after a while, it was because you were the only person that never cared, never reacted to anything I did. It annoyed me" he replied. _

_I rose both eyebrows "So, it all started because you were jealous of me, wow. I was always jealous of you. Your life seemed like a fairytale. You got good grades without even trying, you had girls all over you, you're the most popular guy in school and you're um…attractive." I said, blushing furiously. _

_He smirked but brushed it off and nodded. "Guess we hated how happy we were" he said with a laugh. I faked a laugh, and then thought about my dad, Trish and Cassidy. _

_Oh if you only knew…_

"_So, what happens now?" I asked awkwardly filling the silence._

_He shrugged. "You know that if I'm seen with you, people will start talking, right?" he asked. I felt a little hurt but nodded trying to look cheerful. "So, we could hang out on weekends, get to know each other or whatever, here" he wrote his number down and passed it to me._

_I wrote down my number and gave it to him. _

**-End of flashback- **

"So, um, how's Trish?" I asked her.

She sighed "Still pissed off with you for no reason, well a reason she wont tell me about, I'm really sorry Ally" she said.

I smiled and shrugged but realized I was on the phone "Its fine, thanks for being there anyway. I'll see you later" she said goodbye and I hung up. I walked up to the school gates and leant against the cold metal.

"Ally!" a voice said behind me. I spun around to see Dallas, walking up to me. I smiled and waved. He waved back and reached me. "Hey, Ally" he said pulling me into a hug. I instantly hugged back, taking in his smell. He pulled away, way too soon and smiled at me.

"Oh right, the kiss, um, you see…" I sighed getting really frustrated with myself. Just tell him!

"Dallas, I've had a crush on you for ages, a major one, yesterday your cousin really annoyed me, but its all cool now, and I had a fight with my dad, I guess I was too annoyed to think about what I was doing, I'm really sorry Dal-" I was cut off from our lips connecting, again!

I closed my eyes and enjoyed the amazing moment, then yet again, ended way too soon. He looked at me. "Ally, I really like you too, your awesome, why do you think I got so pissed off yesterday, I hated seeing you in that state, you're so cute and funny, all I've ever wanted to do was ask you out" he looked down to the floor "But I'm sorry, I'm going back to California tomorrow"

Ouch. My heart. "Wh-Wha-what? I though you said you were staying for 6 months" I stammered.

He sighed "I know I said that, but my mom's coming back early, apparently she's already sick of Spain, I don't know. I really wished I could stay longer. But I'll be back next year, hopefully I can say longer next year." he mumbled.

I gave him half of a smile "It's not your fault, Dallas. I really wish I admitted I liked you earlier, it would have been a lot better"

He smiled "Hey, I would've admitted I liked you too, I just thought you never liked me back" the bell rang interrupting us. "I'll meet you after school, and we can say goodbye"

I nodded and we walked our separate ways. I felt my knees shaking and my eyes strangely filling with tears. I knew being with Dallas would just be something I dreamed about. It was all too good to be true.

I wiped my cheeks and headed to class. I stopped in my tracks when I felt my phone buzz. I cautiously picked it up.

'_Listen, you better meet me at the girl's bathroom, now! Bitch'_

Cassidy. Why does she have to make my life…like this? Honestly, I'd rather have pretty boy back torturing me at least he was considerate.

I took a deep breath and headed down to the girls bathroom. This was going to be fun…not!

* * *

"Well, well, well. You came?" she spat. I nodded shyly and pressed my back against the cold bathroom wall. She walked up to me, luckily it was only her.

She pulled me by the arm and pushed me into the middle of the room. "We're gonna play that game again, right?" she asked, I nodded quickly.

"Great, this time, I ask you questions, if I think you're lying or I don't like the answer, we'll see what happens." she spat. I nodded again "first question, Full name"

"Allyson Dawson" I replied in a small voice. She smirked and walked over to my left.

"Second question, what age did you meet Austin?" she asked.

I thought about it for a moment "when we were both 11" I replied.

"Question three, what was your first thoughts on Austin?" she asked, an eye brow rose.

I sighed "I thought he was cute" I blushed lightly and looked downwards.

"Question four, what do you think of him now, Allyson" she asked in a dangerous voice. I thought hard.

What did I think about him now? We were…acquaintances now. I wouldn't consider him a friend yet but I hope I can soon. He seems like an okay guy. Even if he did torment me for 5 long years. wow, maybe I'm warming up to him, he's funny, kind when he wants to be and I've enjoyed hanging around with him for the little time I did. I guess I never really hated him, if I hated him deeply I wouldn't have let him get into my mind and let in convince me to give him a chance. But he wants a 'secret friendship' does that mean he's embarrassed by the fact we're now okay? What if he never tells anyone, and we're stuck sneaking around? I can't handle a secret friendship; I'm already a bad liar. What would happen if we hung around in public? Oh my god what would Cassidy do to me? I think she'd actually kill me. Rip me limb from limb. And tell me to 'keep off her man'. But then again their not together now, right? He called her a bitch and walked in on her and that other guy having, um, fun. Wait, why am I talking to myself?

I was awoken by a sting across my face. I realized that Cassidy had slapped me, causing the healing cuts she made to reopen. "Answer then!" she screamed.

I gulped "Um, he's a jerk" I lied. Of course I didn't think that but if Cassidy finds out we're 'secret friends' it won't end up being good.

She rolled her eyes and grabbed my wrist tightly. "Don't. Fucking. Lie. You fat, ugly slut" she hissed, squeezing my wrist tightly.

I gritted my teeth and felt the anger rise up in me. I pulled her hand off my wrist. "Don't you ever call me a slut!" I screamed at her, taking her and myself back.

"Don't talk to me like that, you little bitch" she screamed and slapped me again. I let this build to the anger.

"You're the bitch, you spend your time trying to make people feel shit just because your too much of a slut to get a real boyfriend." I snapped back.

She stood there, I could see the fury in her eyes. She took a piece of my hair into hr hands and ripped it fully out. "Don't ever talk to me like that again or else I'll fucking kill you" she screamed while ripping more chunks of my hair out.

I screamed in pain and kicked her in the shin. She let go of my hair and glared at me. "I've had enough of this! Your just a little whore who needs to get a life. Stop saying crap about me!" I screamed.

She grabbed my arm again and dug her nails in "Ally, I can do more than say shit about you, I can make you want to kill yourself by tomorrow. So don't test me" she hissed and threw me across the floor.

She was much stronger than me. Much more fierce than me. And to put it straight, I was terrified of her. She kicked me in the stomach and bent down to me. "Got it?" she asked in a sweet voice. I nodded weakly. She stood up straight again "good" she yelled while kicking me harder in the same place. I let out a strained cough and curled up into a ball.

She took my bag and opened it, emptying everything onto me. "This is our little secret, or else, right?" she asked. I nodded slowly. She smiled and walked out of the bathroom, leaving me in agony.

I felt my phone buzz. I carefully lifted it out of my pocket.

'_Where the hell are you, Mr evince is throwing a fit. Are you okay? - belle x' _

I lifted my body up and I lent against the wall, curling into a ball again. I dug my head into my knees, trying not to hurt my stomach and cried into my knees. I felt the tears come down like a waterfall.

Her words kept running in my head "this is our little secret, or else"

I wasn't planning on telling anyone. No matter what. I'll never tell.

* * *

**:) **


	11. Passing notes in class

**Paige Mellark-Lynch: ****OMG I'm so sorry did I actually make you cry?! Wow, sorry, have a virtual hug! :D Just thought I'd apologise to you that's all.**

**Yeah, sorry about how depressing the last chapter was, I hate to say but it's gonna get worse pretty fast, sorry! Hopefully this chapter is better!**

* * *

_~chapter 11: Passing notes in class~_

I pulled myself up off the ground and wiped my tear stained cheeks. I looked into the mirror at my deathly pale skin, red cheeks. I was right the cuts were open again, i had red puffy eyes. I looked terrible. I walked over to the sink and ran the cold tap. I cupped my hands and took some water into my hands and threw it onto my face. I let out a sigh as the cold water relaxed my burning cheeks. Thank goodness I wasn't wearing any make up today. I took a step back and looked at myself again, a lot better. I slowly lifted up my shirt to revile a huge bruise, coving the whole of my stomach. I dropped my shirt in an instant. I felt myself tremble but stopped it. I picked up my stuff that Cassidy had thrown everywhere and placed it back into my bag. I took a deep breath and walked into the corridors. I felt everybody's eyes on me, but I carried on walking keeping my head held high.

I sighed as I heard the old comments back;

"she's such a freak"

"what is she wearing? What a loser"

"so pathetic, no wonder nobody likes her, she should get lost"

"look at her cheek. Why doesn't she just go die"

Just keep walking. Don't listen. Just get to class. Just walk. They'll get sick of it and stop soon.

Oh, What's the point of lying to myself. They'll never stop. I'll have to live with it through all of my high school life.

I walked quickly to my next class, without making eye contact with anyone. I opened the door and was met with more suspicious eyes. I turned my attention to the teacher. Mr fisher, i'm always late when i have him "where have you been, miss Dawson" why do all teachers address me that why when I'm in trouble?

I cleared my throat "I, um, got a little sidetracked I'm sorry" I replied sheepishly. He narrow his eyes at me.

"This is the second time you have been late to my lesson I'm going to have to-" his eyes wondered down to my scared face, then to my wrists which were now starting to bruise. He looked back up to my eyes. "Don't let it happen again" he mumbled and pointed to the empty seat, the same as last time, next to pretty boy. Should I still call him that? never mind, it's a cool nickname anyway.

I sighed, secretly pleased with the seating and sat down at the seat. I relaxed into my seat and stared at the front feeling a little awkward. I rested my forehead onto the desk and sighed deeply.

I looked up as I felt something soft slide besides me. I turned to see pretty boy smirking at me. I narrowed my eyes and picked up the piece of paper.

'_Hey, you okay you seem stressed :)_' I smiled at his concern.

I quickly took a pen and replied '_I'm fine, just tired that's all. What are you 5, passing notes in class'_

I passed him the note, carefully making sure none of his friends saw it. He read the note and frowned, he scribbled something and passed it to me.

_'Hey! Don't knock the note passing. This is used in every romantic movie. What can I say I'm just that sweet_.' I giggled a little too loudly and everyone spun around to me. Curse my loud laugh.

"sorry, I had something stuck in my throat" I mumbled, feeling the embarrassment seeping its way into me.

I heard pretty boy chuckle to himself. I wrote back quickly. _'Stop laughing at me! It's your fault I laughed anyway._'

I sighed and began doodling on a random piece of paper. I grinned as a note slid next to me. I was enjoying this way too much.

_'I'm just funny, deal with it. You free tonight? Wanna hang out? Jay's cancelled his party…_' I rolled my eyes and smiled at his reply.

_'when do you stop partying, seriously you never stop. Party this and party that. Do you now know when enough is enough? Yeah sure I'm free'_ he quickly wrote back before the bell rang.

_'I do know when I stop! Awesome, I'll text you after school, later'_ the bell rang and he quickly ran off. I rolled my eyes again and packed my stuff up and headed for the door.

"Ally, can I have a word?" mr Fisher said in a concerned voice. Oh crap. I smiled and walked over slowly to his desk.

"Ally, I've very worried about you, your never late to my lesson, but over these past few weeks you have been late, not worked, messed around and this lesson I saw you passing notes to Austin Moon. I didn't know you two were close. I hope you don't take this the wrong way but, people like you shouldn't be friends with people like him, he's a trouble maker. Yes, he might get good grades but that's luck. He's not good company" he said with a smile on his face. I gripped my book in my hand.

"Thank you for your concern, mr fisher. But I think I'll chose whose good company or not. He may not be the best behaved person, but he means well. And I'm sure we both know it. Thank you for the advice though, I really appreciate it." I replied.

"Whatever you want sweetheart. I still don't think your friendship will last" he said shrugging. I felt my mouth drop open. I spun on my heels and stormed out of the classroom. Walking to my next one. I walked past everyone and stormed into the classroom. Luckily nobody was in there. I sat in my seat and opened my book onto a fresh page.

_Dear diary, _

_I have never been so furious in my life. Actually only when pretty boy ripped my skirt off and reviled my 'granny pants' as he called them…moving on. Mr fisher, is an absolute idiot! He saw the bruises that Cassidy did and confronted me about them after class. He said and I quote; 'I saw you passing notes to Austin Moon. I didn't know you two were close. I hope you don't take this the wrong way but, people like you shouldn't be friends with people like him, he's a trouble maker.' _

_What the heck is that about? Ugh, I really hate him now. Pretty boy's not so bad once you get used to his joking, smirking, grinning, annoying habit of flipping his hair, his overuse of shrugging, his big ego and head, what was I talking about? Oh right, he's a good guy and he seems genially sweet. I'll chose who I want to be friends with! Oh crap class started…30 minutes ago. Crap again. _

_Lots of love, Ally x_

* * *

How long does it take someone to come out of school?! I've waited here for 10 freakin' minutes for pretty boy. _"oh I'll meet you outside school in 5 minutes'_"yeah right. Oh gosh, this is a cruel joke isn't it, he's going to pop up with his friends and laugh at me and say how he'd never be friends with me. That evil, lying, too good for nothing piece of shi-

"Hey" oh right, i knew that.

I smiled up at him, since he was way taller than me. "Hey, so what's the plan?" he shrugged. Like I said overly use of shrugging.

"Whatever" he replied, digging his hands into his pockets. Could he be more of a pretty boy at this moment?

Is sighed "Fine, we can go to my house, it's only 5 minutes away…and you live a few doors away from me so you know that" I smiled sheepishly as he chuckled at me.

We started to walk, the silence killing me. "Oh yeah, you know mr Fisher right? He said some crap about you" I said as I jumped up and down with anger.

He gave me a funny look and rolled his eyes. "That guy has always hated me, why what did he say?" he asked.

"Well, he said he was concerned about me because he saw my wrist that, um, I did. Then he said he saw us passing notes and then said people like me shouldn't be friends with people like you, whatever that means, then he said you're not good company." I said and took a deep breath.

He frowned again "I'm great company, everyone loves me! I bet he saw you pass me a note, your pretty lousy at hiding stuff" he said with a mocking smirk.

I rolled my eyes and playfully pushed him "Modest much? Anyway it wasn't me, you were one who kept sliding them over the desk!" I argued back.

We arrived at my house and I quickly opened the door and let him in. I froze as I remembered my dad. He can't know! Nobody can know about him.

I dumped my bags on the floor and led him upstairs. I left him sat on my bed while I walked over to my dad's room.

"Hey dad, how are you?" I asked quietly.

He smiled at me. "I'm fine honey. How was school?" he asked.

I looked behind to make sure he wasn't coming "Awesome, everyone kept asking for a new song" I replied with fake enthusiasm.

"I'll let you rest" I whispered as I walked out, back into my bedroom.

Pretty boy narrowed his eyes at me "Who were you talking to? And where are your parents?" he asked standing up from my bed.

I shrugged. Great, he's got me doing it now. "Nobody. And my dad's…at work now, i dont want to talk about my mom" I lied. His eyes narrowed further.

"your hiding something, Dawson" he said as he pushed his way past me. He walked over to my dad's room and placed his hands on the doorknob.

"Please don't go in there! Please" I pleaded as I ran up to him.

He didn't listen and quickly opened the door and saw my sick father lying there on the bed, coughing.

* * *

**About updating: I'll update every other day, because I also need to update my new story 'bad reputations and autographs' (if you haven't please check it out, much appreciated) so I'll update this one, one day then the other one the next. If I'm feeling in a creative mood I'll update then as well. **


	12. Getting closer

**OMFGGGG 103 reviews that's freaking amazing! Omg I love you guys! AGHHH sorry I'll calm down and start writing now.**

* * *

_~chapter 12: Getting a lot closer with pret- I mean Austin~ _

"Hey Ally, who's this?" my dad asked, lightening up at the sight of us both.

I sighed "Dad, this is pretty bo- Austin! Austin, this is my dad" I said quietly. I can't believe I called him pretty boy in front of my dad.

My dad smiled at him. "nice to meet you, Austin. Ally never brings friends home, even though she's very popular."

This day gets better and better…

Pretty boy frowned but shrugged after "She certainly is, we all love her at school, she's the main event there, very popular" he said with a small smirk.

I felt myself blush harder with every word. "Anyway. We'll let you rest, dad" we both said goodbye, shut the door and walked back into our room.

"I told you not to open the freakin' door you idiot!" I yelled at him.

He rolled his eyes at me. "Blame yourself, you tell me do to something, I'll do the opposite. Almost everyone does that, miss I'm so popular"

I felt myself glare at him. "Shut it!" I sighed and sat down on my bed. He slowly sat next to me, watching me like a hawk.

"I think you deserve to know. 7 months ago my dad was diagnosed with leukaemia, about 4 months ago now he refused treatment for it because he wanted to…you know. I've been helping him out in any way since. I've now got 2 jobs because my dad can't really work and we need the money. I don't have time to do all my homework, sleep enough, that's why I sometimes fall asleep in class. I told my dad when he fell ill that I had become very popular, that the whole school loved me and the songs that I wrote. I told him I was the queen of the school. I didn't want him going thinking I was miserable with my whole life. I didn't want him knowing that I almost tired to kill myself, he wouldn't be able to bare it" I told him with honesty.

He started at me looking shocked, he ran his fingers through his blonde locks. "listen, Ally, I'm so sorry. I don't know how much I contributed to this pile of crap you're going through, but I'm sure I piled it sky-high. I feel like such a twat. Did you really…try to kill yourself?" he asked looking concerted. I smiled at the fact he called me 'Ally'. He'd never called me it before it was always, 'freak' and 'nut job'

I looked down, feeling ashamed and nodded "6 months ago. I barely got through my mother's death. I really didn't think I could get through another one." I whispered.

**(Austin's p.o.v…Finally!) (1)**

What the fuck was I thinking? How can I feel so shit about this? I've got along with Ally for what? About 3 days and she already can open up to me this much? I can't believe I caused most of this. Maybe I should tell her…No. She'll only flip out, and I kinda like getting along with her. She doesn't need to know yet.

I slowly pulled her into what I intended to be a light hug, but she changed it to a hey-lets-squeeze-Austin-to-death hug. She rested her head into my shoulders. I felt her light breath hit my bare arms, giving me small Goosebumps. She stayed on my neck for a while. Then her head pulled up slowly, her face red as a tomato.

"s-sorry" she stuttered with a small smile. I shrugged and she rolled her eyes. " um A-Austin, Please don't tell anyone, please" she pleaded looking straight into my eyes. I gulped and nodded slowly. A huge smiled spread across her face and she swung her arms around me again. I hugged back and we both pulled away again.

"So, now we've got everything off our chest, what do you wanna' do?" I asked. Not everything, liar…

She sighed "um, we could, watch a movie, go out somewhere-" she started until I cut her off remembering something.

"Didn't you say you write songs?" I asked, a smirk appearing on my face.

She blushed a light pink and nodded slightly.

My smirk widened. "Awesome, can I hear one?" I asked. She shook her head almost straight away.

I frowned "well, why not. Don't you trust me?" I asked, feeling a little hurt. **_she shouldn't trust you._ **A voice screamed into my head.

She smiled and laughed.

"It's not that I don't trust you Austin, it's just, I've never shown any of my songs to anyone, I have really bad stage fright, you see?" she replied with a small blush.

I smirked "well that sucks, I love to perform" shit why did I say that, stupid, stupid mouth…

Her face brightened up "Really? What do you play?" she asked, leaning toward me looking interested. I sighed. No going back now.

"I play every instrument there is" I said with a proud grin. She rolled her eyes at me.

"yeah, right, the guitar?" I nodded.

"Drums?" I nodded again.

"Trumpet?" I nodded while leaning back and relaxing.

"banjo?" I shot her a weird look but nodded. She sighed in defeat.

I smirked "Oh and I also sing, but I don't write songs. You have that advantage on me." I said with a shrug. She smiled and fist pumped the air.

We sat there in silence for while, both of us sighing occasionally. I sighed for what seemed the 100th time and got up off of the comfy bed. "C'mon. we're going out somewhere" I said as I took her hand and pulled her up with ease.

She dusted herself off and smiled clueless at me. "where are we going?" she asked.

I shrugged "Anywhere, I can't stand being indoors for ages" we walked quickly down stairs. She called goodbye to her dad and I led her round to my house. She stood outside frowning at me. "Austin, why are we at your house?" she asked.

I walked up to my car and patted it on the roof. "Spill anything on my baby and I'll literally kill you" I warned while opening the car door for her.

She let out a high pitch girly scream and ran up to me. "I've always wanted to ride in your car…it's a hot car" she said with a grin.

I narrowed my eyes at her "Most girls don't care about cars, they just care about the guy in it" I replied, slightly impressed. She shrugged and walked pat me into the car.

"Most girls? I'm not most girls" **(A/n: Agh I hate how cheesy that line is, but I had to put it in any way :D) **she said with her cocky attitude. I shut the car door and walked to the other side of the car and climbed it. "so where are we going?" she asked.

I grinned "The mall" I replied. Her mouth dropped open in the perfect shape of an O.

"You…would be seen…with me?" she asked slowly with a small that was gradually growing.

I gulped "Um, well you see, about that, if anyone who we know is there I'll have to act like I still hate you." her smile disappeared in seconds.

"oh, okay, I get it. Cool" she said and replaced the huge smile with a tiny one. I sighed and started the engine.

* * *

"Please! Cheryl Cole is so much better than Taylor swift" she argued back. I let my mouth hang open dramatically, and scoffed.

"Um, hell no girlfriend. Taylor to the swift is totally amazing" I replied in a girly voice. She let out a loud laugh and pushed me playfully. I laughed along with her. A small blonde haired girl came running up to us with a huge smile on her face.

"Ally! I've missed you so much, you've hardly been in school" she screamed and pulled Ally into a hug. Ally smiled and hugged back instantly.

"I've miss you too, Belle." she replied and they both pulled away. She turned to look at me. "oh right. Belle this is Austin, Austin, Belle" she said and pointed to us both.

Is shot her a small which she gladly returned. "Um Ally, Is it okay if we hang out today?" Belle? Yeah, Belle asked, shooting glances at me every so often.

Ally looked at me and I immediately nodded. "Sure" she replied with a smile. "See you later Austin, thanks so much for today, you've been great" she said with a small wave.

I waved back "See you later, Ally." I replied. The two quickly ran off together.

I sighed. I better go find _them _now…

* * *

**(1): Yeah i wont be putting a lot of Austin's p.o.v in this story just a heep hear and there when it matters**


	13. I think i might like you

**Okay, so i know that the last chapter was confusing, but trust me it's gonna become clear very soon. **

* * *

_~Chapter 13: I think i might like you~_

**(Ally's p.o.v)**

"Allison Dawson, you better spill. What's going on between you and Austin?" Belle asked me while chewing on a french fry.

I rolled my eyes at her "Nothing's going on between us. We're just getting along a lot better. We're just friends" I stressed.

She raised a brow at me "That's a understantment. You don't flirt that much with friends" she said with a small smirk.

I stuck my tounge out at her "We weren't flirting. That's totally gross" I argued back.

She now rolled her eyes at me. "Oh Austin let me push you just so I can feel your toned abs, oh Austin you're so hot, i just want to kiss you over and over" she said while imitating me in a childish voice.

"Belle" I whined. "I wasn't flirting with him, besides his body's not that nice" that was a complete lie...

Her mouth dropped open "You've seen his body, what happened? Wait, I don't need all the dirty graphic details though!" she faked a gag.

I scoffed "Please. Do you really think I'd lose it my, you know, to him. You know I'm waiting until I fall in love, I want my first to be special" I said with a distant, zoned out smile.

"Yeah, back on earth Ally. Sex is just sex. It's nothing special besides maybe you are in love, first stage is denial" she said with a grin.

"I don't like Austin! And I'm certainly not in love with him!" I yelled.

she smirked "Denial" she sang. I groaned and banged my head on the table. I lifted my head and chewed on my lip a little.

"Belle...what if i was in love with him...which I'm not. But what if I fall for him? It could happen right, you know I fall for guys way too easily." I asked with a worried expression.

"Ally, Ally, Ally, don't be scared of love. Trust me, he feels the same way...he's flirting back isn't he" she nudged me with a wink.

I felt my cheeks heat up and i rested my head back onto the table. "Well, he now knows about my dad" I said slowly.

"He what?!" Belle screamed making the whole mall look at us. I smiled nervously.

I kept my head on the table, not looking at her "He was at my house. Wipe that smirk off your face we didn't do anything, and he heard me talking to my dad and he said I was hiding something so he walked into my dad's room and after I had to explain everything to him, we kinda had a moment" I smiled wearily at her.

she placed her hand onto her heart "Aw, young love is so sweet, so did he freak out?" she asked.

I shook my head "Actually, he apologised a lot. He said he shouldn't have treated me the way he did, and apparently he was jealous because everyone was comparing me to him. That's why he treated me like crap" I replied with a shrug.

She rolled her eyes "Dude, c'mon. Do you really believe that? Are you positive he didn't just want your attention? You maybe a loser at school, but your hot. I mean that in a friend way" she said with a wink.

I sighed "I'm sure, he's the most popular guy in school. He's got every girl after him. Including all the cheerleading squad. Why would he settle for plain, old, boring me...not that I want him to anyway" I lifted my head and saw Belle glaring at me.

"Girl, you better stop that. Your Ally freakin' Dawson. Any guy would be totally lucky to have you. Period. You need to take a long hard look in the mirror, stop acting so shy all the time, it's time you came out of your comfort zone" she stressed while picking up her bags.

"And Ally. If you don't like him, why are you stressing over the fact he might not like you" and with that, she left.

* * *

I sat on my bed, my head resting on the backboard of it. I sighed deeply to myself. What if I possibly...maybe, sort of, might have fallen for Austin already. The thought seems more true every time I think about it.

I reached down at the side of my bed and took out my book from my school bag.

_Dear diary,_

_I'm so stuck. I can't decide what to do. I need guidance. I need an angel to tell me exactly what to do. Should I tell Austin about my feelings? Or not? I've only really known him properly for a couple of days. But it feels so much longer than that. It feels like I've known him for years, like I know every single bit of detail about him, and whatever I don't know, it leaves an empty space inside of me._

_I've never felt so weird in all my life. My heads telling me I'm crazy, I mean come on, me and Austin. Me and **the **Austin moon. He'd never like me back even if I did tell him I like him. And beside I'm positive I don't. It's just stupid Belle, she's gotten it into my head._

_But then my heart, It's screaming at me to stop being such a drama queen. That it wouldn't be such a bad thing if I did like Austin. He's a great guy. He's funny, passionate, caring...when he wants to be, sweet and he's cute. But then I can't help but think, what if we never became friends? Would I still hate him as much as I did? What if I never hated him, I was just trying to hide my feelings._

_I don't want to ruin our friendship. It could be the only chance for us to actually get along. Is it worth screwing up our friendship just because I might have a tiny crush on him. We've gotten a lot closer. We're on first name basis now, I actually call him Austin and He calls me Ally. I love the way he says my name. _

_Please, someone, please just tell me what I should do. I'm no good at this stuff._

_I'm scared. I'm scared of rejection. I'm scared of losing him as a friend. I'm scared because, I might actually like him. Like I said to Belle. **Every** girl is after him. The type of girls who wear short skirts, tight tops and high heels. I just wear floral dresses and converse, I'm nothing special. They all have bleach blonde perfect hair. I have boring dark brown. They all have gorgeous sky blue eyes. I have plain brown ones. I'm just nothing compared to them. _

_Sometimes it feels like he likes me back, he'll joke flirt with me, he'll smirk when I call him cute or attractive, he'll wink at me a lot, but I can't help but feel he's just being nice. I just don't know, why are these things so complicated..._

_Lots of love, Ally x_

I closed my book and stared at the ceiling, thinking how easy it would be if I had never become friends with Austin.

* * *

_I reread the text I sent Austin about 5 minutes ago._

_**'I really need to talk to you, can you come round a.s.a.p?'** _

_I was going to say it doesn't matter, until he replied moments after._

**_'I'm on my way, be there soon x'_**

_He put a mother fudging kiss?! What does that mean? I really hate him at this moment in time. Why does he constantly lead me on? It's more torturing then his name calling and pranks. _

_I jumped as the doorbell rang. I nervously made my way over to it_ _and opened the door. Austin stood there shooting me a worried look. Gosh, he looked cute. I stood aside and let him in. He slowly walked in, not taking his eyes off me. I closed the door and walked over to him._

_"__Ally, you're freaking me out? What's wrong?" he asked looking deep into my eyes. I gulped and looked away._

_"Austin, really don't know how to say this...I-kinda'...maybe like you" I stammered._

_He stood there staring at me, without even blinking. Crap, I knew this was a bad idea._

_"I'm sorry I shouldn't have told you, Lets just pretend I never said anything, we can go back to-" I was cut off by him pushing his lips to mine. I instantly shut my eyes tightly closed and kissed him back, twice as hard._

_I guess he likes me back then.._

_Lets just say things got heated pretty fast_

_We made our way over to the couch and I laid back onto it, not breaking our lips apart. He took his lips away from mine and began kissing my neck, going slowly down to my collarbone._

_ I felt my head roll backwards. He made his way back to my lips. His tounge lightly slipped against my bottom lip, making me quickly part them. He broke the kiss and began taking off my shirt, a look of lust in his eyes._

And that's when i woke up in my bed, drenched in cold sweat, shaking.

* * *

**^^that's probably very confusing for you guys. **

**I'll just say, the last part; it was a dream. I know your probably wanting to kill me now, screaming at your laptop. O.o Admit it, you got pretty piss off.**

**I just had to do it though :P**


	14. Best day ever

**Lets get to it because I'm so excited for this chapter! woohoo!**

* * *

_~chapter 14: Best day ever.~_

I quickly walked over to Belle, shooting Trish a small smile. "Something is seriously wrong with me!" I stressed. A smirk spread across her lips.

"I'll be back in a minute, Trish" she said while dragging me off to a corner in the school.

"So, what happened? It's about Austin right? Did you kiss? Did you admit you like him? Are you still a virgin?" she asked, jumping up and down excitedly.

"All of those things but...not physically" I replied, chewing a strand of my hair.

She narrow her eyes at me. "Start making sense. What actually happened?"

I sighed "Okay, I had a dream about him. I had text him to come round to my house, I was going to admit I like him. He arrived moments later, I let him in and I actually admitted it. He didn't say anything so I started to apologise. Then he kissed me. The kinda kiss that means you-me-this bed-now. It got rather steamy. We ended up on the couch and he started to take off my top. But then I woke up…sadly" I said, blushing at the last part.

"Ally, it was only a dream, its not like it actually happened, right?" she replied with a shrug.

I nodded sheepishly "But Belle, I wish it did happen in real life. I know I said yesterday that I don't want to lose my virginity to him. But now, I kinda' want to"

She shivered "Trust me Ally, sex isn't that great. It hurts, it's scary and no matter how much you ask him to, he'll never call you back. But, why don't you just go admit you like him?" she asked.

"Like who?" a voice asked from nowhere.

We both let out a piercing scream and spun around to see Austin. Fate hates me.

"No-no no one. Not you, I mean. Just this guy, pft, you don't know him. You've never met him before in your life" I stuttered, getting redder and redder.

"Hi Austin!" I screamed, taking him back. Great this is the Dallas situation all over again.

"That was smooth" Belle whispered into my ear while walking off.

I smiled nervously up at him "Sorry I'm a little jumpy today" I said with a small laugh.

He nodded and smirked at me. "So, who's this guy you like then?" he asked, leaning his arm on the locker besides me.

I gulped and leant backwards a little. "J-just this guy. I barely know him" I replied nervously.

He chuckled "What's he like?" he asked, a smirk pulling on his lips.

I sighed "A lot like you" I murmured under my breath. "Um, he's cool. In our year." I said with a small smile.

I rolled his eyes "Try to at least narrow it down" he asked.

I chewed on my bottom lip "Okay, he's..." I found myself looking straight into his eyes.

"He's really funny, he's always making me laugh. He always knows how to make me smile even if i'm mad at him. I've only really known him for a couple of days but I feel like it's been forever. We always flirt but he never seems to realize that I like him, He's really cute, too. Whenever I'm around him I just feel safe. But a lot of girls are after him, and I'm sure he doesn't like me back, he just thinks we're friends" I said with a small smile.

He shot me a sympathetic smile "He sounds like a dick, he'd be lucky to even be friends with you, you're awesome" he replied, winking at me.

"Thanks Austin!" I said pulling into a quick hug.

Should I laugh because he just called himself a dick. Or should I just come straight and tell him it's…him.

Wait, that would really kill the mood… "Oh, by the way Austin the guy I've been talking about all along is you, fancy that?" yeah because he'd take that well. _Note my sarcasm._

"Did you hear, they've moved the talent show closer, it's only 4 days away now, I'll come see you perform" he said with a wink. I let out a large groan and shook my head. "C'mon ally, do it for me!" he pleaded. I swear I felt my heart do a flip.

"No, no way, not in your life time" I replied . I snapped my neck up and looked at him with a smirk on my face.

"Hey, you perform, how about I write a song and you can sing in for the talent sh-" he cut me off.

"No. Ally, do you know how long it's taken me to get this rep. if I sung in front of anyone, It would be the end of me" he stressed.

I rolled my eyes at him "You're such a drama queen, I bet you've got a good voice" I said while elbowing him playfully.

He grinned "Whatever, wanna hangout tonight?" he asked.

I felt a smile creep onto my face, pulling at the sides of my mouth. "Sure" I Squeaked.

He narrowed his eyes at me. "Okay" he replied slowly.

I huffed to myself "I'll meet you after school again, we can go to my house" I said with a small smile.

He nodded. "Awesome, see you later Ally" he waved as he walked off.

I sighed and leant against the lockers. Stupid ally. Stupid, stupid girl. He's just Austin, it's not like he's Brad Pitt or something. I looked at the sign up sheet for the talent show. I slowly walked over to it and picked up the pen, Austin's words running through my mind. "Do it for me" I sighed.

"Do it for Austin" I whispered to myself while writing down my name. I smiled and dropped the pen.

I felt a sharp nail tap my shoulder and I immediately stiffened up.

I turned around slowly to see Cassidy glaring deeply at me. "Listen freak, bathroom, 5 minutes, be there" she snapped before turning around and storming off.

I gulped. I'm in deep doo-doo.

* * *

I slowly and cautiously walked into the girls bathroom. "Hello." Cassidy said with a smirk on her pretty little face.

I walked forward to her, trying not to look imitated by her. "Hello, Cassidy" I managed to let out in a big breath.

She narrowed her eyes at me. "Someone, has been talking to my boyfriend. What have you been saying?" she screamed.

_Ex boyfriend, whore!_

"Um, he's just been saying that I'm a freak, and I, um, I have no friends" I stammered nervously.

Her glare deepened at me. "Don't lie. I heard you talking like normal to him, like you were the best of buddies. Keep away from my boyfriend short ass" she snapped and slapped me across the face.

I let out a squeak of surprise and hurt. "I'm sorry, we've been getting along, and we, I, he-" she cut me off by slapping me again.

"Shut the fuck up. Listen bitch, if I ever see you with him again, I'll cut off your fat little arms, then your fat little legs and I'll watch you squirm, got it" she yelled.

_What a nice way to put it, you have such a way with words!_

She gritted her teeth and punched me in my jaw. "I've told you before about answering me" she screamed, her face red with anger.

I let a tear fall down my face as I felt a warm liquid run out of my mouth.

"s-s-so-sor-sorry" I stammered. I felt my whole body shake with fear.

She put both her hands on my shoulders and pushed me into the wall with all her strength. I felt my head smash against the bathroom wall. She stormed over to me, pulling me up by my hair.

She put both her hands around my neck and held me up against the wall, tightening the grip around my neck.

"I can't breathe. Please" I cried out. But she merely let out a laugh and tightened the grip more. I felt my throat clench up and I became light-headed.

I saw black spots in front of me, they kept getting closer. But before they could obstruct my whole view, she let go of me, causing me to go crashing into the ground. She kicked me in the stomach, causing the bruise to almost even yell in pain.

"Stay away from him. And if anyone hears about this, especially Austin, I swear to god, I will kill you, here. cover up the bruise on your face" she demanded while throwing a tub of cover-up to me. She glared at me before storming out. I put my fingers to my lips and looked at them, they were covered in blood.

I picked up the cover-up and tried to stand up. I fell back into my butt with force. I let out a yelp of pain.

"Hello? Are you alright in there?" _shit, it's Austin. _

Think, reply, do something. "um, I'm fine" I replied shakily.

"Ally? What are you going in there?" he asked, his voice getting closer. I started to panic.

"I fell over, the floors wet, don't come in, I'm fine" I managed to get up and support myself from the sink.

"You don't look fine" his voice said. I spun around to see him standing there, his arms crossed, glaring at me. How is he so cute?!

I let out a nervous laugh. "Make up, gotta' love it," I said pointing to the bruise.

"Get out of the girls bathroom" I snapped. I took out the cover-up and began applying it to my cheek.

He walked over to me and snatched it from my hands. "Who the fuck did this to you Ally?" he asked, eyeing the whole of my face.

I crossed my arms across my stomach, but immediately uncrossed them as I felt the bruise sting.

"Nobody, I told you, I fell, now go away" I yelled, grabbing the cover-up from him.

He sighed and made his way in front of me. "Tell me, Als" he said softly.

A nickname, holy mother of Mary. He gave me a nickname. Don't fall for it, Ally. He's trying to win you over with his god-like cuteness.

I frowned "I-I-I, can't tell you" I said looking down at the floor.

He put his index finger under my chin and lifted my head up, making me look into his eyes.

Don't fall for it, don't fall for it!

"I-I-I...wow" I stammered, making myself look like a complete idiot.

He put on a cocky smirk. Which made me roll my eyes.

You could say we both got caught up in the moment. Because he started to lean in, and I found myself doing the same.

I closed my eyes and felt a smile spread across my lips. Before I could do anything he pushed his lips against mine. Not like my dream, this kiss my sweet, soft and…it didn't feel right, huh.

Ah well, Best. Day. Ever!

* * *

**Okay, that kiss wasn't a dream, So now you can go back to loving me;)**


	15. Part 1: Can hearts actually break?

**Okay now that I've won you back, ummmmm….lets just say you might hate me again after this chapter but who knows…*hides behind a tree***

**Reflections of Twilight: yeah I looked over it and I was like "oh right… I forgot to get him to wipe her lip…awkward" sorry about that:/ lets use our imagination and pretend he did because I'm a lazily ass **

**ANYWAY!**

**This is part of a two-part chapter…exciting right?! :D**

**Yes, I've updated in the same day I actually couldn't stop writing this story, I have something wrong with me…**

**I'm just going on now, to the story!**

* * *

_~chapter 15, part one: Can hearts actually break?_

How dare he?! How fudging dare he kiss me then totally avoid me for 3 fudging days?! Ugh, I'm so annoyed. You don't just kiss someone then ignore them, do you? He hasn't even been at school, what the heck?

Agh!

_-flashback-_

_We both pulled away. I couldn't look him in the eye. I couldn't even breathe. _

"U_m, c'mon let's get you to the nurse" he said pulling me up by my arm. I nodded and followed him to the nurses office._

"O_h dear, what happened?" the nurse aske as she pulled me away from Austin and sat me on the seat. I smiled._

"_I just fell in the girls bathroom, Austin helped me-" I stopped as I turned around and saw that Austin was gone. "never mind" I mumbled._

_-end of flashback-_

That was it…_poof _and he's gone. He didn't even tell me why he kissed me, not that I was complaining or anything, but when someone you think doesn't like you, kisses you, your gonna' want an explanation.

I'm so confused right now.

* * *

I pushed the door's of the school open, them making a loud bang on the wall. I didn't care, I was too pissed off _(excuse me)_ to care. I needed to speak to him, I don't care who watches, I don't care if anyone says anything, I just want to know how he feels about me. I can't go on like this like…a lovesick puppy that ever gets the bone, only gets to lick it, actually forget that it sounds kinda' perverted.

I pushed past the crowd of people and stormed over to the 'populars'.

"Where's Austin!?" I snapped. They all looked at me, shock in their eyes. "Well?" I asked tapping my foot impatiently.

"He's in the drama room with Cassidy" Jay answered, shrugging.

Wh-why was he with her?

I nodded and quickly stormed off to the drama room. I slammed the door open and they both stood there, staring at me. Well Cassidy was glaring but still.

I stormed up to them and pushed Cassidy out-of-the-way "Move it, Barbie!" I hissed. She took a deep breath and stood in front of me.

"Excuse me, what did you just call me, freak" she hissed back.

I don't know what happened, I think I just snapped.

"DON'T EVER CALL ME THAT AGAIN YOU FUCKING WHORE" I screamed, throwing my bag onto the floor.

She stepped back, her face looked genuinely scared. But it didn't stop her from arguing back. "Listen hear you fat little bitch, if Austin wanted to see your ugly face, he'd find you, so fuck off" she snapped, moving back next to Austin. Why was he just standing there?

I felt my jaw tighten. I walked over to her so we were only inches apart "Now you listen here Cassidy, I've had just enough of your bullshit, I've put up with it for far too long. Now, if _**you **_don't fuck off in the next 3 seconds I swear to god, I'll tell everybody our little secret. Now take your fake, plastic ass and piss off" I snapped and pointed to the door. She huffed and walked off.

"Man that felt good" I mumbled to myself. But I knew I was in absolute crap with her now, she'll probably kill me. I slowly turned to face Austin, who stood there, jaw dropped.

"I didn't know you had that in you" he murmured. I smirked but then sighed.

"Austin, I, we, I, we need to talk" I said calmly we both sat don't next to the wall and remained silent for a while.

"I know what I did was wrong. But I guess I was…distracted if that's what you want to call it" he said, a nervous smile on his lips.

"what-what do you mean?" I asked.

Don't say it, don't say it. Please don't say it!

"That…kiss it didn't mean anything, right?" he mumbled awkwardly.

I told you not to say it, damn you, Austin moon.

"Right, it was stupid, I know" I said with a fake laugh. He smiled and let out a deep breath.

"I know right. We're just friends, nothing more." he said with a laugh.

Can a heart actually break? Because I think mine just did.

Tell him, Ally. Tell him that kiss was you pouring your heart out to him. Trying to tell him how you really felt! Just tell him.

"Austin I-I" I trailed off and looked down at the floor. "Am glad you feel the same way I do" I said with a small smile.

"You're an awesome friend, Als" he said as he pulled me into a hug.

"Yep, I'm an awesome friend" i replied.

And that's all I ever will be.

We pulled away and smiled at each other. "I saw your name on the talent show list" he said with a smirk.

I felt myself blush and I nodded. "Yeah, it's tomorrow" I said.

His smirk widened "you nervous?" he asked in a mocking voice.

"A little" I'm crapping myself.

He shrugged "I'll be there to support you" he said with a wink.

_Stop it! Stop leading me on._

I mentally groaned. "Great, thanks Austin" I replied.

He smiled back. We both got up and headed out of the drama room.

How can he not tell how crazy I am for him?!

I should just forget my feelings towards him...

What was he doing with Cassidy?

Worst. day. Ever.

* * *

**Sorry about the shortness but it was a double update (just randomly started to singing 'Double take'... just because you needed to know that and because I'm hyper) **

**BUT, the next chapter; is going to be very long, I hope. And emotional people will get...emotional? :/**


	16. Part 2: Nothing left for me

**Here's the 'emotional' chapter...it made me friend cry...yeah.**

* * *

_~chapter 16 part 2: Nothing left for me~_

"Wait I thought he broke up with Cassidy?" Belle asked.

I sighed into the phone. "He did, I think. He said she was a bitch and everything, besides he'd tell me if he was still with her" I replied, laying down onto my bed.

"Ally, maybe Austin's not the guy you think he is. Remember before this how he made you feel, you used to cry yourself to sleep at night because of him. Are you sure your right about him?" she asked, sounding concerned.

"I know, I know. We hated each other. But I really think he's changed, I can't describe how I feel about him, whenever I'm around him I just feel…happy. But yesterday, it's like it all vanished, like all the hope in the world was gone, just because he said we're '_just friends'_ I don't know Belle, I just think we're not meant to be" I said, running my fingers through my hair in frustration.

Belle scoffed into the phone "Ally, I've seen the way he looks at you, mars could probably see the way he looks at you. It's obvious he likes you back. But something's stopping him…" her voice trailed off and she began to mumbled to herself about 'untrustworthy.'

"Belle! I'm sure he doesn't like me back, and I can trust him. I trust him with my life." I blinked and realized what I just said.

"Okay, Ally. Just promise me you wont fall for him too...deep. Something just doesn't seem right here, I'm just looking out for you" she said in a soft voice.

I rolled my eyes and put on a fake laugh "Thanks, it means a lot to me. And I promise I wont fall too hard" I replied.

Too late, I was knee-high in this situation already.

We said our goodbyes and hung up.

I sighed and looked outside my bedroom window.

I am in so much trouble right now.

Hurting?

That's not even the word for it. I've never felt so icky…did I just say icky? Never mind, I've never felt this horrible in all my life. It's like my heart was just given up on everything. I can't even smile for real anymore. It's been like, 5 hours since we decided that we're 'Just friends' and I feel like my entire life is over. How can someone have this much of an effect on me?!

I'm like some clueless blonde from a chick flick who never gets the knight in shining armour. Never. Never ever. Never ever, ever. Not a chance in hell.

I just don't care anymore. I don't care about anything. My grades, school, friends, the talent show, life itself.

I always promised myself I wouldn't fall for the wrong guy. Boy was I wrong. My life's gone down hill ever since I realized I liked Austin. **Why do I have to like him?!**

Why couldn't I just stay liking Dallas. At least he likes me back. But he's gone. And to be honest , I don't care about him either. All I want is to curl up into Austin's arms and stay that way forever. I want to be able to kiss him without him regretting it. I want to be able to look at him and make him smile just by smiling, like he does to me. I want to make him feel as good as he makes me feel.

But no, that's never going to happen. I'm living a fucking fantasy (Yes I swore! Like I said I don't care) I don't give two flying zebra shits anymore I just want Austin here with me.

* * *

**-The Next day-**

I peeped out from behind the curtain and looked at the crowd. Kill me.

Where was I? behind the school stage?

What was I about to do? About to go on stage in front of about a thousand people and sing.

Why? I have no idea. Oh right, because freakin' Austin made me!

The true question is; how am I going to get out of this?!

I turned around and glared at Austin and Belle. "I can't do this" I snapped.

Belle rolled her eyes at me. "Yes you can, who are you? Tell me who you are!" she yelled, placing her hands on her hips.

"I'm Ally freakin' Dawson" I said half-heartedly.

She smiled proudly at me. "Good, now get your ass on that stage!" she said while pushing me.

I stepped aside and let her fall to the ground. "I can't. I'm sorry, I just can't" I replied while walking out. I felt someone grab my arm and pull me back. They turned me around and I became inches away from Austin.

Oh god, it's happening again.

"Als" he said slowly while tucking a strand of my hair behind me ear.

I felt my breath hitch in my throat. I looked downwards at the floor again. But he placed his fingers under my chin and lifted it up.

This is what happened last time! Stop, stop, stop. Please, I'm begging you.

He blinked "Als, listen to me"

I felt his breath hit my face, sending shivers up my spine and back. I gulped and only managed to do a single nod.

"You are one of the most amazing people I have ever met, Ally Dawson. You're funny, you're crazy, you're passionate. You have **nothing** to be afraid of. Everyone is going to love you. Just don't think about it. Just imagine that I'm the only person who is watching you. You can do this, I believe in you." he said softly while stroking the side of my cheek with his thumb.

I've died and gone to heaven…NO ONE try to save me.

I felt a smile tug on my lips. "Austin that's the sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me" I whispered with a large smile.

It's now or never, Dawson.

"Austin I need to tell you something, I really like-" I was cut off by the principle.

"Ally Dawson, your on, go!" he yelled, panting.

I sighed and smiled at Austin before walking slowly onto the stage.

Breathe, breathe. Oh shit I've forgotten how to breathe. Why am I so nervous? Think of Austin. Think…of…Austin.

I slowly walked over to the piano and sat on the stool. I didn't dare turn to face the audience. I let my fingers slide over the cold keys until they got into the right places.

I gently pressed down the keys and smiled as it let out the beautiful melody. I started to sing and pour my heart out.

_Conversations with my thirteen year old self_

_Conversations with my thirteen year old self_

_You're angry_

_I know this_

_The world couldn't care less_

_You're lonely_

_I feel this_

_And you wish you were the bes__t_

_No teachers_

_Or guidance_

_And you always walk alone_

_You're crying_

_At night when_

_Nobody else is home_

_Come over here and let me hold your hand and hug you darling_

_I promise you that it won't always feel this bad_

_There are so many things I want to say to you_

_You're the girl I used to be_

_You little heart__broken thirteen year old me_

_You're laughing_

_But you're hiding_

_God, I know that trick too well_

_You forget_

_That I've been you_

_And now I'm just the shell_

_I promise_

_I love you and_

_Everything will work out fine_

_Don't try to_

_Grow up yet_

_Oh just give it some time_

_The pain you feel is real you're not asleep but it's a nightmare_

_But you can wake up anytime_

_Oh don't lose your passion or the fighter that's inside of you_

_You're the girl I used to be_

_The pissed off complicated thirteen year old me_

_Conversations with my thirteen year old self _

_Conversations with my thirteen year old self_

_Until we meet again_

_Oh I wish you well oh_

_I wish you wellLittle girl_

_Until we meet again_

_Oh I wish you well_

_Little girl_

_I wish you well_

_Until we meet again_

_My little thirteen year old me _**(1)**

I wiped a stray tear that fell down my cheek and stood up from the stool. I didn't even realized the cheering crowd. I got a standing ovation? Wow.

I smiled and bowed, then ran off the stage. That couldn't have gone any better. I ran straight up to Belle and pulled her into a bear-hug.

"Ally, where did you learn how to sing like that, you're amazing!" she yelled as she pulled away from the hug.

I smiled and laughed "Thank you so much, Belle!" I screamed and hugged her again. She pulled away and smirked, looking behind me. I turned around to see Austin, mouth open, staring at me.

"I'll leave you two alone" she mumbled while winking at me, walking away.

"you were…you were…wow" he exclaimed while walking up to me.

I laughed "Thanks, I really owe it all to you, if it wasn't for you, I wouldn't even have gotten up onto that stage. Thank you so much, Austin" we hugged for a couple of seconds

"Als, there's something I need to tell you" he said slowly. I nodded for him to continue. He opened his mouth to speak but a loud scream came from behind us.

I spun around to see Cassidy, glaring at me with hate written all over her. "That's it you little bitch, I told you to keep away from my man, now I'll actually kill you!" she screamed. She ran up to me and began pulling on my hair.

"Get off me!" I yelled back while pushing her off me. She stumbled backwards and glared at me again. "Fuck this, you're not going to push me around anymore. Look what you fucking did to me!" I screamed, lifting up my shirt to reveal the huge bruise that covered my stomach.

She became bright red, was it with anger or embarrassment? I don't know.

"I didn't do that, you liar" she screamed, putting on an innocent act.

I rolled my eyes at her. "I don't need this!" I yelled while picking up my stuff. I turned towards Austin "Thanks again, Austin" I whispered with a small smile. He nodded in reply.

I stormed off, pushing past Cassidy as she screamed at Austin.

Maybe they are going out still. Austin wouldn't lie to me though. I know he wouldn't

I almost ran home. I couldn't wait to tell my dad! I just couldn't

I quickly opened the door of my house, dumped my stuff onto the floor and ran upstairs. "Dad! Dad guess what I did today, you'll never believe it!" I screamed as I entered his room.

I stopped in my tracks. There he was…just lying there. Not moving. No. God, Please no.

I ran over to him "Dad, please, wake up, please, it's me! It's your little Ally" I yelled while tears came pouring out of my eyes.

I took my phone out and dallied 911. I told them my address and my dad's condition. They told me to "sit tight, an ambulance is on its way".

I tightened the grip on my dad's hand. "Please don't go. I need you. Please" I cried, rocking backwards and forwards.

Before I knew it the ambulance arrived. They out him onto a Gurney and took him to the ambulance. They told me I could go with them.

I quickly ran to the back of the ambulance and sat next to him, watching him through my tears.

* * *

An hour?! ONE MOTHER FUCKING HOUR I'VE BEEN WAITING AT THIS GOD FORSAKEN HOSPITAL! They wont let me even see my own freakin' father.

I called Belle while I was in the ambulance. She brought along Trish, I didn't care though. They both just sat there, hugging me telling me it's going to be okay.

"Ally, you've got to stay positive" Trish said in a calming voice.

I didn't even turn to look at her. I just stared at the wall. She sighed and leant back against her chair.

I jumped up as I saw the doctor walking up to us. "I'm afraid he's not looking any better, he's stable, but he's very weak, you can visit him in a couple of minutes" he said with a supportive smile. I smiled back and sat back down.

"ALLY!" a voice screamed, echoing the whole hospital. I turned my head to see Austin and…Cassidy?!

He ran up to me and pulled me into the tightest hug ever. I pushed him away. "Why did you bring her along, Austin? So she can mock me while my dad dies?!" I asked, no expression on my face.

He sighed. "Me and Cass never broke up, that's what I've been trying to tell you." he said in a soft voice.

I shook my head. "No offence Austin, but I couldn't care less right now" I mumbled.

He ran his fingers through his hair nervously. "There's something else" he murmured. I looked up at him.

"I'm moving…to new York, with Cassidy. And I want you to come, I'm sorry to tell you this now but-but-" he whispered, his voice breaking.

What the hell?!

"wha-what? Why?" I asked, my voice shaky.

Cassidy glared at me. "If you wont tell her the truth Austin, I will" she snapped and smirked at me. "He wants you to be his song writer or whatever" she said rolling her eyes.

"I don't understand" I said, trying to figure it out.

I scoffed "Don't you get it? That's why he was trying to get along with you, so you could become good friends and you can write him songs and he can become famous" she said with another smirk.

She's lying, she has to be. She just has to be. Please say she's lying

I turned to Austin, who was looking down at the floor.

"It's true? You-you were only using me, what happened to 'singing would ruin me' or whatever" I whispered. I let fresh tears fall now.

"Als, listen" he replied.

I cut him off "Don't ever call me that again. I trusted you, I fucking trusted you, Austin. I was actually dumb enough to believe that you cared about me? You're sick. I-I-I-I-" I broke out into hysterics. Belle and Trish wrapped their arms around me.

I couldn't take it anymore. I had to tell him how I felt.

I stood up and looked at him in the eye. "I liked you Austin. Actually, I think I'm in love with you. Stupid me, right? Because deep down I knew it was too good to be true. You actually liking me back? Of course you wouldn't. because I'm typical fat, ugly, stupid, naïve, Ally Dawson"

"I can't believe it was all a game to you. You were using me all along. You're an asshole, Austin moon. I don't know what I ever saw in you, but I know that it's gone now" I yelled at him. I was trying to prove it to myself more than anyone.

"You and Barbie here can go to new York together. I'm not coming. Have a nice life. I hope you get everything you want." I mumbled.

"Ally, I'm so sorry" he replied. He reached out for my cheek but I stepped backwards.

"It's too late for sorry now." I looked down to the floor. "I hate you, get out of my life" I whispered. He didn't move.

"JUST FUCKING GO" I screamed. He sighed and walked out with Cassidy.

I broke down onto the floor.

"Ally, I'm so sorry, I knew he was a jerk" Belle whispered while rubbing my back.

I stood up and wiped my tears. He wasn't worth it. He wasn't worth any of my tears.

I held my breath as the doctor came walking up to us, a sympathetic face on.

"Miss Dawson."

My breathing quickened. Bad news. I knew it.

"I'm really sorry, I know i said your father was fine, I'm afraid your father has had a bleed to the head which wasn't found quick enough. He has but minutes left. Would you like to say goodbye?" he asked.

This can't be happening. Not in the same day. I can't lose the two people I care about most. Not in the same day.

I nodded slowly and followed him to the room where my dad was laid. I walked over to him and took his hand.

"Hi princess" he said in a weak voice.

I smiled "Hey Daddy. I um, I preformed in front of the school today, one of my own songs" I said, trying to sound enthusiastic.

His face brightened up "That's my popular little girl. I always knew you were meant to be a superstar" he squeezed my hand.

"I don't want you to go, Dad" I whispered.

A tear fell down his cheek and he smiled "I'll always be with you, princess. I'll be looking down on you. Me and your mother, together again"

I smiled and let more tears fall "I know, tell mom I miss her, please" he nodded. "I love you so much, Dad" I continued. I kissed his cheek.

"I love you too" he whispered. He eyes slowly started to close.

_Beep. Beep. Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep_

"Dad?" I whispered. No answer.

"Daddy?" still no answer.

"Please don't go. Please don't leave me" I whispered. I rested my head on his chest and cried into it.

It's all over, and now there's nothing left for me.

* * *

**(1): Conversations with my 13-year-old self - p!nk.**

**Okay, so my other story 'Bad reputations and autographs'…I'm thinking about deleting it. It's honestly not my best work and I've lost all inspiration for it. But if I do delete it, i'll write another story since this one is almost over...YES, THIS STORY IS ALMOST OVER :'(**


	17. He's my inspiration

**jazzrun10: don't worry the story will unravel and show why soon**

**micchir333: About 3 (including this one) I want to end it on 20 chapters or so.**

**I just want to thank everybody for all the amazing reviews you've given, you all actually made my cry, happy tears are the best! Who'd have thought I'd get 18 reviews on one chapter:D**

* * *

_~chapter 17: He's my inspiration.~_

It had been 2 weeks since my father's death. And I, was literally the real version of a living zombie. I haven't eaten, I haven't slept, I haven't moved from my bed. I haven't talked to anyone except Belle and Trish (yes, me and Trish are friends again) I made them swear not to tell anyone about my dad, I didn't want to be shipped of to some care home. They kept me updated with school, not that I cared but it was amusing to hear the stories about me like;

"Ally Dawson? I heard she ran off to be a prostitute"

"Yeah, I heard Austin moon got her pregnant"

"I heard she ran off with the circus"

Who the hell makes up that shit?

Trish told me she saw Cassidy and...he-who-must-not-be-named arguing and they broke up in front of everyone, actually he broke up with her.

I break down every time I hear his name. I was a mess. I shouldn't be like this over anyone, I mean it was mostly over my dad. But he-who-must-not-be-named kept adding to the pain. Every time he tried to call me, every time he tired to text me, every time to comes around and climbs up to my window and begs me to forgive him.

I just can't. No matter how much I want to just forgive him and just forget about the past. I know I wouldn't be able to trust him again, not like I used to. I want to…so much. Because I think I -deep down- I want to trust him. And quoting Kate Voegele;

'You Can't break a broken heart'

Which, matter of a fact, was true. I've been getting a lot of crap recently, bricks thrown at my windows, eggs thrown at the house, one word; tp. And all the other childish nonsense that people do. I just didn't care. I had no clue what I've done wrong to deserve all the crap they've done. I didn't care to ask. It was probably Cassidy, thinking he-who-must-not-be-named broke up with her because of me. Whatever, stupid bitch.

Week one: I went completely mad. I broke almost everything in the house, I went insane. I wrote a couple of…interesting songs about Aust…he-who-must-not-be-named, songs like;

Why Did I Ever Like You?

Make damn sure

Cold as you.

I hope you die **(1)**

I was pretty pissed off with everything, of course I don't meant any of the songs…maybe I hope you die. Just kidding. I didn't mean any. I'm not one to hold a huge grudge unless you piss me off over the limit. I guess I didn't 'hate' him.

Last week I would have said…and I quote. "I hate him with a burning passion of the sun of mars, I hope he gets his head chopped off by a freakin' rusty knife" I told you I went crazy…

Week two (this week): I broke down, that's when I stopped eating, sleeping and caring completely. I just wanted to die. To end all the pain. But, I'm a wimp. I would never be able to kill myself. No matter how much pain I was in.

Belle and Trish have begged me to go to school, go to work, eat, see a councillor…Trish rung up Jenny and explain why I haven't been attending work. She said I could take off all the time I needed. I'd written a little bit in my book;

_Dear Diary,_

_Why does it hurt so much? Why was I cursed to feel pain. Why was I even born? Does god hate me or something, is that why he made my dad leave the earth and why HE played that...joke on me? _

_What did I ever do to deserve this? I was never a bad girl. I didn't swear...only when needed. I never hurt anyone. I did as I was told. _

_I guess that was the problem; I was too nice. I fell for HIM too soon. If I didn't, I would have seen this coming. But no, Love blinded me. _

_The way his stupid smile was so contagious that it made me feel like I wasn't in control of my body. The way his stupid hair was so perfect all the time, even when he was stood in the wind. The way his stupid jokes would cheer me up in a matter of seconds. The way he was so perfect. UGH._

_I remember when I was little, love seemed so enchanting back then. It seemed so wonderful. What a joke. I hate it. I'll never fall for anyone again. Never. As long as I live I will never fall in love again. _

_Lots of love, Ally x_

Today, is Monday.

And (god save me) I am going to try to go back to school. I just hope someone stops me before it's too late. I'm dreading it.

"Ally! Get your bony ass in that school now!" Trish screamed at me. I rolled my eyes and stayed put.

"This is serious, Als" Belle said with a small smile.

I froze to the spot. "Please don't call me that" I whispered. I sighed "Guys, I appreciate you trying to help me, but, it's been 2 weeks. And **he's** gonna' be in there. I just wont be able to face him" I mumbled. Trish sighed and grabbed my arm.

"I know I've got to be supportive here but…Grab the other arm Belle" she yelled. They both took an arm and dragged me, kicking and screaming, into the school and then, pushed me through the doors.

I stood there, pure frozen to the spot, everyone's eyes on me while it was silent. I gulped and turned to face Trish and Belle.

"Can I go now?" I begged they both shook their head and pointing to the opposite end of the corridor. I sighed and began walking slowly down it.

Don't look up. Don't make eye contact with anyone.

"So, you're not dead?" a voice asked. The voice that I hated so much. A voice that made nails on a chalkboard sound beautiful. That my friends was the voice of Cassidy.

I gulped and turned to my left to see her, standing there, a smirk plastered across her smug face. "H-hello Cassidy" I said trying to sound confident.

She scoffed "Hello, home wrecker" she spat. I let my mouth drop open.

"I'm not a home wrecker!" I argued. She rolled her eyes.

"You stole my boyfriend!" she screamed.

I, now rolled my eyes. "Oh please, you can have him, I don't care. If I really wanted to set myself up to get hurt, I'd jump of a bridge, It would hurt less than falling for that heartless prick" I yelled back. I spun around and began walking away.

"Everyone knows you're still in love with him!" she replied. I froze on the spot, again! I could almost hear her stupid, glossy lips turning into another smirk.

Don't let her get to you, Ally!

I turned around and stormed up to her, slapping her across the face. "You fucking bitch. Don't you ever tell me how I feel. Because you don't know shit about how I **felt** towards Austin. That's right I did love him. I would have screamed it from the roof tops if I had to. But now I see, what a pathetic twat he is. And you. Your just as bad. Your both heartless and immature. And I've learnt from my mistakes. I don't love him anymore. Now I know what he's like, I learnt that the hard way." I snapped, giving her a death glare.

She rolled her eyes "I can't believe you don't even see it. Well, your loss, Ali-slut" she spat and walked away.

What the freakin' hell was that supposed to mean?!

* * *

I dragged my feet along the school corridors. I normally don't ditch. But today, I am. Especially when my lesson is with him. I can't cope. I've walked past him so many times today and every time I do it breaks my heart more, if that's even possible. Why does he constantly want to leave me suffering. When I walk past, he smiles at me. When I look away, his smile disappears making me want to forgive him.

When he tries to talk me and I ignore him, it hurts me to see that I'm hurting him. No matter what he's done to me I still feel something for him. It's just not fair. I don't want to love him anymore! Why can't I just forget. Just erase my mind of everything. But it's not that simple. I'm going to have to try to get over him. If I can...

I think I've waked around this school about 10 times now. What am I doing? I shouldn't be ruining my chances of a good future because of some guy.

I spun around and walked back to ym class.

I stood outside the door, hesitating to go in or not. I peeped through the glass and saw that perfect blonde hair at the back of the room. I sighed and opened the door slowly and walked in.

"Ally dear? Please, take a seat" Miss Munroe said with a small smile.

I nodded and took my seat. Sadly, it was in front of him. I told you fate hates me. I sighed and tried to fight the urge to turn around and explode my feelings all there. I felt a poke on my back.

Oh god. Be the mature one Ally.

I bit my tongue and turned around at the slowest speed possible. Our eyes met, making me bite my tongue harder.

He smiled a little and passed me a small piece of paper. I took it and turned back around.

_'It's good to see you're back, I've missed you...'_

Does he not remember what he did to me or something?!

I gritted my teeth and wrote back.

_'I dont really care'_

I know, harsh. But if I didn't snap I'd end up falling at his feet. He slipped the piece of paper onto my table.

_'Als, please, can you wait for me after this class I need to explain everything to you'_

I rolled my eyes.

_'Whatever, don't get your hopes up' _

I scrunched the piece of paper up and threw it at his head, it hitting him in between his eyes.

I faked grin and turned back around, my grin soon disappeared. Gosh, why does he do this to me?

I took out my book and began to write a song;

_Tall, dark and beautiful_  
_He's complicated, he's irrational_  
_But I hope someday you'll take me away and save the day, yeah_  
_Something in his deep brown eyes has me sayin'_  
_He's not all bad like his reputation_  
_And I can't hear one single word they say_  
_And you'll leave, got places to be and I'll be OK_  
_I always forget to tell you I love you, I loved you from the very first day _**(2)**

I admit it, the song was about the blonde idiot behind me. I couldn't help it, he was like a drug to me. When ever he was around me I just wanted to break into song or write until my hands bleed. No matter how much I hated him, he's my inspiration.

I jumped as the bell rang, interrupting my thoughts. I mentally cured Trish and Belle for making me come here today.

I put my book back into my bag and walked out of the classroom as fast as possible. But not to my surprize, i was caught by the wrists by he-who-must-, oh forget it, by Austin.

He didn't let go, or say anything, he just dragged me out of the school.

"What are you doing? I'll call rape!" I screamed, trying to ignore the feeling his hand brought to me.

he didn't reply he carried on dragging me. We stopped at an abandoned park. A freakin' park. What was wrong with this guy?

He sat down on a bench, me doing the same. I crossed my arms tightly. "I'm waiting" I snapped. He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Ally, the reason I did what I did is.."

* * *

**DUN, DUN, DUUUUN.**

**Gotta' love a good cliffhanger. **

**(1): ****Why Did I Ever Like You - P!nk… (yes I do love her!)**

**Make damn sure - taking back Sunday**

**Cold as you - Taylor swift**

**I hope you die - blood hound gang. (one of the best/funniest songs ever)**

**(2): Superman - taylor Swift**


	18. Why can't I just forgive him?

**Jesus…I can't believe what is story is causing, phone's out in class,**

**abandoning my families, screaming at laptops, people hating me. God, I didn't realize this story was so interesting for you guys….It's kinda heartbreaking that there's only 2 chapters left after this one**

* * *

_~chapter 18: Why can't i just forgive him?~_

I laid on my bed. I regretted everything I said to Austin. I didn't mean it. I was pissed off. I really wish I could take it back. He probably hates me now. I should hate him back, but he's not 'hateable'...it's a word.

Really, it's impossible for me to hate him. He could kill my cat (if I had one) and I'd still feel the same way I do about him. I hate the fact I can't change my feelings about him. But still… maybe he'll give up on trying to win me back now.

_-Flashback-_

_"Ally, the reason I did what I did is because, Cassidy told me you were a song writer. She said you were quite good. Cassidy always knew about my passion for music. She said I should gain your trust, start getting along with you then we'll move to new York, you'd write songs and soon enough I'd become famous. She was fame hungry, we both were. I believed that it would work. So, I tried getting along with you. At first it was hard trying not to call you any names. The it got easier and easier as I spent more time with you. I got to know you and I realized you we're really cool. Then, I told Cassidy I didn't want to go with her plan anymore. She flipped out and started yelling at me saying I was stupid. Then I think that was when she started to give you crap. So, I told her I'd go along with the plan if she didn't hurt you. So, then I got to like you more and more. All the way through the things we did you have no idea how much I wanted to tell you, Als" he said softly, looking into my eyes the whole time._

_I took a deep breath. "Then why didn't you tell me, Austin. You built up my hopes sky-high just so you could tear them down!" I yelled, getting more annoyed._

_He shook his head. "I didn't want Cassidy to hurt you" he whispered._

_I scoffed "To fucking late. She punched me, she kicked me, she tried to strangle me for crying out loud. Besides, you're the one who already hurt me" I spat._

_He winced at my tone but I didn't care. "Als, I'm so sorry, if I could I'd go back and start over again, our friendship is really important to me, I love yo- how close we were" he replied, blushing a little._

_Was he going to say he loved me?! No, he'd never like me that way. Besides, you. don't. want. Him. To…_

_I rolled my eyes and glared at him. "It's a little late now. Let's just go back to the way things used to be. Where we both hated each other. It was better that way. You can go back to your popular life which you loved. And I'll go back to being a loser, hating my life. Pretty boy!" I screamed at him. I was totally in a rage now._

_He sighed "If that's what you want, Als" he mumbled. I rolled my eyes and stormed off._

_-end of flashback-_

Gosh, I felt so stupid. That happened a week ago and the heartless wonder hasn't spoken to me since. Actually, the other day he called me 'freak' again. When I said I wanted to go back to the way things used to be, that's not what I meant. But normally he just avoids me. I should be happy about that. But, I'm not. I want him to try again. I really do...

"Ally, you've got to eat something!" Trish yelled at me making my head shoot up.

I stared down at my tuna roll. I didn't seem very appetising to me.

I shook my head, "I don't want it, I don't deserve to eat" I cried while resting my head on the cafeteria table.

"Oh for god sake Ally, if you really regret what you say, apologise to him! You'll go back to being friends" Belle said as she rolled her eyes at me.

"No, I don't want to be friends again. He hurt me, bad. And he can't seem to notice that. He just thinks he can apologise and I'll fall for him again." I sighed "I-I…h-hate him" I stuttered. But I meant it!

Trish scoffed "Really? What if I told you he was behind you, holding a guitar?" she asked with a smirk.

I frowned and spun around. It was true, he was standing a few feet away. An acoustic guitar in his hands. He flashed a smile at me.

My eyed widened when he climbed onto the table in front of him. Oh shit. Don't do what I think you're going to do.

Everyone became silent. Staring at him. He cleared his throat awkwardly.

"I did something that I regret with all my heart. And I'll probably regret it for the rest of my life if this person doesn't forgive me. I tricked her, I befriended her just so I could have a chance of fame. It was a stupid idea. Because in the process of this plan…I fell in love with her **(A/n did anyone gasp? haha)** and I want to prove how sorry I am to her. This person is Ally Dawson"

All eyes came to me. I gulped and felt my face heat up. I took a chunk of my hair and began chewing on it.

"This song is called 'Best Of Me' now, I can't write songs as perfect as you, Ally. But I mean every word in it" he said with the most cutest face ever...just saying.

He started to strum the guitar slowly.

_It's so hard to say that I'm sorry_

_I'll make everything alright_

_All these things that I've done now what have I become_

_And where'd I go wrong_

_I don't mean to hurt, just to put you first _

_I won't tell you lies (I'm sorry)_

_I will stand accused with my hand on my heart_

_Im just trying to say_

_Im sorry it's all that I can say_

_You mean so much and I'd fix all that I've done_

_If I could start again_

_I'd throw it all away to the shadows of regrets_

_And you would have the best of meI know that I can't take back all of the mistakes_

_But I will try_

_Although it's not easy, I know you believe me, 'cause I would not lie_

_Don't believe their lies,_

_ told through jealous eyes, they don't understand (I'm sorry)_

_I won't break your heart, I won't bring you down_

_But I will have to say_

_Im sorry, it's all that I can say_

_You mean so much and I'd fix all that I've done_

_If I could start again_

_I'd throw it all away to the shadows of regrets_

_And you would have the best of me_

_Im sorry its all that I can say_

_You mean so much and I'd fix all that I've done_

_If I could start again_

_I'd throw it all away to the shadows of regrets_

_And you would have the best of me _**(1)**

He stopped strumming the guitar and the room erupted in cheering.

That song, was perfect. Oh my god. He risked his reputation for me. Oh my double god I can feel my eyes tearing up.

_You don't care, Ally. He hurt you deep. _

He jumped off the table and walked over to me. I stood up and we became face-to-face. I gulped and chewed on my bottom lip.

"Austin" I sighed deeply. I can't believe I'm doing this in front of everyone.

"I'm sorry, I can't forgive you. I really want to, and I've tried to convince myself to. But I just can't. I'm so sorry" I whispered not lifting my eyes from the floor.

I looked up and for the first time I couldn't read his expression. Anger? Heartbreak? Disappointment?

He griped the guitar harder, and threw it across the room so it smashed all over the cafeteria. I'm gonna' go with anger.

I winced at the huge bang it made, the pieces of wood going in every direction.

"I can't believe you're holding a childish grudged over this. I just admitted I fucking loved in front of the whole school!" he spat.

I scoffed "What and you're embarrassed by that or something? God, Austin you need to start realizing that maybe I just will never forgive you and that I don't feel what I felt for you before" I yelled. _Lies..._

The whole cafeteria watched in shock.

He gritted his teeth. "I fucking give up! Fuck you, Ally. I tried. I'm sorry I'm not perfect enough for you!" he screamed and stormed out of the cafeteria.

"You're too perfect for me, I'm just not good enough for _you" _I whispered to the empty spot where he was stood a few seconds ago.

I've never felt so guilty in all my life. I turned him down In front of the whole school. He told the whole school he loved me. And I bet now he regrets it. Why couldn't I just forgive him…

* * *

**(1): Sum41 - Best of me**

**2 chapters left now D: **


	19. Gone for good

**Guest: YES! I did see him. He was sooo cute in it :) yeah I was like 'duh, it's not really unexpected'…haha**

**Thank you for all the amazing support guys! I really do love you all:D**

* * *

_~chapter 19: He's gone for good, I'll never forgive myself~_

**-The next day-**

I groaned and looked at Trish and Belle. "I'm an idiot aren't I?" I asked rhetorically.

Trish nodded straight away "Yep, you are" she replied popping the 'p'.

"What?! Belle do you think I did the right thing?" I asked.

She shook her head hesitantly "No Ally. He poor guy poured his heart out to you in front of the whole school. And you still turned him down, even though everybody knows you love him!" she yelled at me, pointing a finger in my direction.

I frowned. "Why did you put it like that. Now I feel terrible" I pouted. Belle rolled her eyes at me.

"Allison Marie Dawson! If you don't stop feeling sorry for yourself I'll kick your ass to Austin's house myself." she spat.

I saw Trish shiver at the mention of Austin's house. "Trish" I warned "What is it?" I asked glaring at her.

She cleared her throat "Well, I overheard some news about Austin" she said slowly.

I held my breath. "Wh-what is it?" I asked, desperate.

"He's moving, to new York. Today. At about 5pm I heard Cassidy say she was going to see him off but he told her not too. I'm sorry Ally" she whispered.

I shook my head "You're lying. You're just trying to prove I still have feelings for him." I said with a small, hopeless smile.

Her frown didn't move. "Shit, he's really going?" I asked worriedly. Trish nodded.

"He-he can't be. He can't go. I need him" I cried. They both stared at me.

"So now you admit it, when he's about to move away!" Belle said as she rolled her eyes. I sighed and got up.

"Where are you going?" they both asked in unison.

I took a hold of my bag "I'm going after him." I told them.

"Ally, what about school? Besides it's only 2, he's leaving in 3 hours. You've got time" Trish said as she rested a hand on my shoulder.

I sighed and sat back down. "I just don't want him to go" I whispered.

* * *

"Since when do you drive?" I asked Belle, looking at her Roush 5XR **(1).**

She smiled proudly. "About a month ago, my mom and dad were saving since I was about 10." She replied climbing into the car.

"Okay, it's 4 now, it'll take us about 30 minutes to get there, let's go" Belle yelled while starting the car.

I sighed and got out my book from my bag and began to write down all my thoughts.

_Dear diary, _

_We're now on our way to stop Austin. I really hope we make it. God, why did I turn him down. He's goddamn perfect. His song was amazing, he's apology was amazing, he's amazing. In every single way._

_why did I turn him down? _

_Truth is, I was scared. I've never been in love. It's a scary feeling. When you look at them you want time to freeze because you want to spend forever staring at them. When they touch you it's like 1000 bolts of electrically running through your veins. When they look at you your stomach screams in delight and it feels like someone's stuck a million butterflies in there and they wont calm down. It feels like that one person is in control of you and you'll do anything just to make them happy. You want them to realize how much they mean to you and it kills you when you see them unhappy. _

_So, this is what love feels like?_

_Me, Ally Dawson has fallen in love with the last person on earth I'd ever thought I'd be in love with…Dallas._

_Kidding! Austin moon. I'm in love with Austin moon, I finally admit it. _

_Lots of love, Ally x_

I jumped as the car came to a sudden stop.

"No, no, no! It's already 4:20, Belle!" I yelled, chewing my hair almost pulling it out.

She sighed "I'm sorry Ally, we're stuck in traffic. I can't do anything" she replied.

I felt hopeless.

My breathing became quicker as I watched the time slip by faster than ever and we didn't move an inch.

It was already 4:35.

4:40...

4:45...

"We're not gonna' make it" I cried as I felt my eyes welling up with tears.

Trish rubbed my shoulder for comfort. "We will, Ally. Trust me." she whispered with a supportive smile.

I sighed and looked out of the window again as we started to move slowly.

* * *

"FUCKING MOVE IT!" I screamed as I pushed past the people in the airport. Trish and Belle hot on my heels apologising to people I knocked over.

"Ally! It's gate 3!" Trish screamed at me from behind. I nodded and shot off towards the direction of the gate.

5:05...

I reached the closed gate. Please say it's late or something!

I ran towards the window and watched in horror as the plane made it's way down the run way, gradually making it's way into the air.

"NO!" I banged on the glass repeatedly. "Austin! Come back!" I cried while I rested the palms of my hands onto the cold glass.

It's over. He's gone. And, he's not coming back. I've screwed up. Badly. And I'll never forgive myself.

"I love you" I whispered into the air.

"Ally" a voice whispered behind me. I turned around to see Trish and Belle.

I felt the tears run down my face "We were too late. He's-he's gone" I dropped to the floor in tears.

"This isn't how it's supposed to be! I'm supposed to end up with him, hand in hand, us against the world. It's all wrong!" I cried into the floor.

Trish put her arms around "Ally, love doesn't always have a happy ending, I'm really sorry"

I wiped my tears and stood up "Lets just go home" I mumbled and walked back.

Why didn't I just forgive him. We could have been so good. It could have been a fairytale ending.

* * *

**THE END…**

**JOKE! Sorry I like tricking you guys. One more chapter left! Is that good or bad? :'(**

**(1): Really random choice there**


	20. I'm just your normal social outcast

**You guys, Stop making me feel bad for ending the story… I might make a sequel…but I'm heading more towards a new story (Auslly of course, I have some idea's) which I'll describe more after this;**

**Guest: Heyy again! I'm really glad you like this story so much, you're writing a book? That's awesome. I've 'wrote' a book before (it was very brief) but never published it before…I'm sorry if me stopping this story would give you writers block but there's a slight chance I'll make a sequel or something like that I'll always be writing more stories as long as there are readers. But everything has to come to an end eventually. Sorry again.**

**Last chapter :(**

* * *

_~chapter 20: I'm just your normal social outcast~_

I stayed silent through the whole drive home. I didn't feel like talking at all. It was all over. And I couldn't change anything.

I couldn't write a crappy little love song and he'd randomly turn up and we'd live happily ever after. It doesn't work like that.

I couldn't run after him and beg him to stay.

It was truly, completely and utterly over.

I did nothing but stare out of the window. I let my tears fall swiftly down my cheeks like falling snowdrops.

I wanted things to go back to the was it used to be (no, I don't mean us hating each other) I mean us being close, knowing everything about each other. I don't care if we don't end up dating. I just need him next to me, telling me it will be alright. I need him, here with me, now.

But, he's not. He's never going to be.

It's all in my head. Happy ever after? It doesn't even fucking exist! I have nobody left

Sure, Trish and Belle will be there for me and I appreciate that, a lot. But, it's just not the same as Austin.

He understood me, he listened to me, he cheered me up, he hugged me when I cried.

I want Austin back. I want **my **Austin back, more than anything.

* * *

I got out of the car and turned towards Trish and Belle. "Thanks for helping me out today, it means a lot" I whispered.

They both looked towards each other then smiled at me. "Ally, we're so sorry it didn't work out the way you wanted" Belle said sympathetically. I nodded and gave her half a smile.

"It's fine" I mumbled. I hugged them both and entered my empty house.

I walked slowly up to my dads room and looked around, in taking the surroundings. I sat on the bed and stared at the picture of my mom and dad. They were laughing while kissing each other. I picked it up and hugged it tightly.

"Hey mom, Hey dad. I miss you so much. I've really screwed up. I feel like an idiot. I know you'd probably yell at me for calling myself that, mom." I sighed

"But it's true. I've lost everything. I have nothing to live for. I love Trish and Belle. But they can't stop the pain. No matter how much they try. I feel like everything in this world is against me. I don't know what I'm even doing anymore. It's just not worth it. Now you two are gone…and Austin, it's just not worth it. I loved him. Mom, you always said follow your heart but I never did, I ran away from the truth, I'm sorry. Dad, you taught me to trust my beliefs, but I let you down. I'm so sorry. You're probably thinking I'm crazy for crying over this. But I feel so alone. I wrote a song for you both and Austin. It describes how I feel. I want you to hear it. The first verse is about Austin and the second one is about you guys, remember that"

I took out my dad's guitar out from his closet and began to play it softly.

_I can be tough, I can be strong  
But with you, it's not like that at all  
There's a girl that gives a shit  
Behind this wall you just walk through it_

_And I remember_  
_All those crazy things you said_  
_You left them running through my head_  
_You're always there, you're everywhere_  
_But right now I wish you were here_

_All those crazy things we did_  
_Didn't think about it, just went with it_  
_You're always there, you're everywhere_  
_But right now I wish you were here_

_Damn! Damn! Damn!_  
_What I'd do to have you here, here, here_  
_I wish you were here_  
_Damn! Damn! Damn!_  
_What I'd do to have you near, near, near_  
_I wish you were here_

_I love, the way you are  
It's who I am, don't have to try hard  
We always say, say it like it is  
And the truth, is that I really miss_

_All those crazy things you said_  
_You left them running through my head_  
_You're always there, you're everywhere_  
_Right now I wish you were here_

_All those crazy things we did_  
_Didn't think about it, just went with it_  
_You're always there, you're everywhere_  
_But right now I wish you were here_

_Damn! Damn! Damn!_  
_What I'd do to have you here, here, here_  
_I wish you were here_  
_Damn! Damn! Damn!_  
_What I'd do to have you near, near, near_  
_I wish you were here_

_No, I don't wanna let go_  
_I just wanna let you know_  
_That I, never wanna let go_  
_Let go oh oh_

_ No, I don't wanna let go  
I just wanna let you know  
That I, never wanna let go_

_Damn! Damn! Damn!  
What I'd do to have you here, here, here  
I wish you were here Damn! Damn! Damn! What I'd do to have you near, near, near  
I wish you were here_

_Damn! Damn! Damn! _  
_What I'd do to have you here, here, here_  
_I wish you were here Damn! Damn! Damn! What I'd do to have you near, near, near_  
_I wish you were here_** (1)**

I dropped the guitar onto my lap and began sobbing.

I cried until I couldn't cry anymore, only loud croakiness came from my throat instead. I put the guitar away and sighed.

_The day I first met you, you told me you'd never fall in love _**(2)**

My phone blasted out. I huffed and answered it.

"Hello?" I answered

There was heavy breathing coming from the other side "Ally! Get down to sonic boom now!" Trish practically screamed down the phone.

I rolled my eyes a little, "Trish I don't wanna, I'm miserable here" I whined childishly.

She growled into the phone…she actually growled. "Ally get here now before I drag you here myself" she warned and hung up.

I frowned to myself and got up off the bed. This better be good.

* * *

"Trish I'm here! What is it?" I yelled into the empty store. I rolled my eyes "Trish stop hiding you're not 2" I spat.

I wondered around for a little then got fed up "Screw this" I mumbled and turned around…and froze.

"Hey Ally" I blinked.** (A/n Guess who:D)**

"A-Austin?" I let out in a breath. He stood there sheepishly. I rubbed my eyes a little. I must be dreaming. I have to be.

I walked over to him

_SLAP!_

I hit him across the cheek with force.

"Hey!" he yelled rubbing his cheek.

"That, was for making me think you were actually gone"

I smiled and jumped onto him, bringing us both down crashing to the floor. "This is for coming back" I whispered into his ear.

He chuckled "I never left, something told me not to go…and by something I mean your friend Trish texted me saying; 'if you get into that plane I'll rip you limb from limb' so I didn't get on" he replied, helping me up from the floor.

**Mental note: Thank Trish a million times and buy her a car…if I can afford it**

I smiled widely "So you're not going to New York?" I asked nervously.

He shook his head "Nope, I'm staying in Miami here with you" he said with a smirk.

I walked closer to him "Well that's good, then." I said before crashing my lips into his. He kissed back straight away.

Time stopped. Everything froze.

I savoured the taste of his lips on mine, moving in perfect syncopation. I pulled him closer to me by wrapping my arms around his neck loosely. His arms came around my waist. There was no way I'd ever have a better moment than this.

Sadly. We both pulled away, way too soon. I gleamed up at him. "Oh and by the way…I love you too" I said with a smile. Thinking back to when he admitted he loved me in school.

We heard a chorus of "Aww's" behind us. I turned to see Trish, Belle and Austin's friend Dez.

**Mental note #2: Get to know Dez more.**

I smiled at them. Then turned back to Austin "Thank you" I whispered to him.

He frowned "For what?" he asked.

I grinned "For being Austin moon"

He smiled and kissed me again.

* * *

And that's the story of me, Ally Dawson.

Now, I know things won't get perfect again straight away, with Austin's huge ego (Which is totally adorable I might add) But I know I have everybody to help me along the way, especially Austin.

I mean underneath his bad-boy act, ego, annoying hair flipping habit and childish attitude. He's the most amazing person I know.

Yes, we've had our…difficult times. I showed him the songs I wrote. He loved 'I hope you die' in fact he sings it every freakin' day. And it took him about a month to ask me out properly. And when Dallas returned…things got a little ugly. But in the end we worked it all out. There was also Cassidy to deal with, but Trish soon dealt with her…by pouring ice-cold lemonade on her. Wow… And Austin's now half way to fame, me by his side writing his songs. But things got so much better

And underneath **my **awkwardness, nervous attitude, weirdness and 'lack of fun' which I'm always reminded of my Austin…

I'm Ally Dawson. I'm just your normal social outcast… with a hot, god-like boyfriend who treats me like a queen.

-THE END-

* * *

**(1): I wish you were here - Avril lavgivne **

**(2): Give your heart a break - Demi lovato **

**This is going to be the longest authors note ever (feel free to skim through) **

***holds up an imagery award* I just want to thank all the reviews who supported through this story. And my mom and dad for constantly arguing with me so could hide in my room and write all day. And most of all…my laptop, for being the thing I used to write this story. But seriously now, thank you all sooooo much for reading, reviewing, putting it on your favourites and following this story it's been amazing**

**Yeah…please don't hate me for finishing this. I really wish I could write this forever but I have so many other ideas I want to write. **

**It's been good while it lasted…GROUP HUG!…**

**What was I saying? Right, I read through every…single…review and I started to bawl my eyes out (I'm very emotional) it feels like I'm losing a child. **

**OH YEAH new story ideas… **

**#1: A sequel to this…but I have no idea what would happen so feel free to give any ideas:)**

**New stories: (I'll write a little crappy summary for them)**

**#2: when she cries/nobody's home: Basically Ally lives on her own in an abandoned house, no money, no friends or anything. She attends school but is invisible…blah blah blah (sorry I'm really tired) she meets Austin and tells him she's rich, with a loving family and friends. Scared he'll find out the truth, she's forced to do anything to stop him finding out what her life is really like.**

**#3: How to fit in at a public school (the opposite of that story^^): Ally Dawson is a rich, stuck up snob. She gets whatever she wants and yet she wants more, she wants to be normal. When her mother and father force her to attend a public school she'll try almost anything to fit in. **

**Yeah that's it at the moment **

**Please tell me which/what kinda story you want because I have no idea what to do next**

** I'm still continuing with 'bad reputations and autographs'**

**THANK YOU GUYS SOOO MUCH, ILOVEYOUU! **


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